Fresh Fiction Blog | Joey W. Hill | No Whiny Vampires Please

Though I’m a devoted fan of the vampire tale, you wouldn’t know it by how few books I’ve read in the genre. That’s because I’m very picky. I’m looking for a vampire story with certain elements:

1) No whiny vampires

2) No mandatory killing of food, because it puts a serious damper on sexual interaction related to feeding.

3) No holds barred on the eroticism.

No Whiny Vampires! There were few things I liked about the movie, Interview with a Vampire (though I liked the book), but I loved the quote by Tom Cruise’s Lestat, talking to Christian Slater (I think) about Louis’s eternal melancholy: "Oh Louis, Louis. Still whining, Louis. Have you heard enough? I've had to listen to that for centuries." As many of my readers know, I despise the "Oh woe is me, I’m eternally beautiful, powerful and immortal, and my life sucks." Please. Joss Whedon struck a pretty good balance for it with his Angel series, because he gave Angel a soul and a delightful dry sense of humor (grin).

No Mandatory Killing of Food Of course, I recognize if the story is set up so the vampire loses his soul, or killing humans is mandatory to feed, the human-turned-to-vampire has more weight on his conscience (aka more reason to whine). I think Stephenie Meyer handled this in a skillful and appealing way with her young adult Twilight book (and avoided the controversial issue of teen sex while including a healthy dose of lovely sexual tension – love that meadow scene!). However, for me, the eroticism of a vampire feeding off a delicate female or strong male neck is part of the draw of the genre, so if they can’t do that because they’ll end up killing off the heroine (or hero), it puts a serious cramp in my enjoyment of the book.

I do like the moral dilemma enough that I included an aspect of it in my Vampire Queen series. My vampires, while able to feed on blood 99% of the time without making it a terminal situation, do have to kill one human being annually to maintain prime physical and mental acuity. And here’s the rub - it can’t be a bad or unhealthy person, because the blood can’t be tainted with evil or diseased. So in Vampire Queen’s Servant, the first in the series, that led to a serious soul-searching situation when Jacob, servant to Lady Lyssa, has to help her bring down her annual kill.

No Holds Barred Eroticism: I particularly love the vampire-servant relationship, because my erotic romance has a strong Domination/submission theme. Therefore, that dynamic has tremendous story possibilities. I think my interest in them was first piqued in the Anita Blake book where we meet Richard (can’t remember which one that is, darn it); when he’s climbing out of Jean Claude’s bed, after serving as his pomme de sang.

Exploring the vampire-servant relationship first led me to some very strong female vampire characters and the alpha males willing to submit to protect and love them (Vampire Queen’s Servant/Mark of the Vampire Queen: Lady Lyssa and her servant, Jacob, a former vampire hunter; and Vampire’s Claim: Lady Daniela and Dev, her resourceful bushman, who gets entangled with her in 1950s Australia to reclaim her sheepstation).

Since my vampires consider themselves quite superior to humans, it has led to some great explorations of unconditional love in inequitable conditions. My vampire world has the dichotomy of being very "might is right" (in short, if a female vampire is powerful/old enough, she can wipe up the ground with a lesser male vampire), but also Old World (male vampires feel threatened if the females care a little too much about anything other than male vampires!)

My latest one, Beloved Vampire, needed a gentle vampire, though. Lord Mason, like most vampires, has a wide streak of Dominance. However, my heroine, Jessica, is a human fugitive who escaped a brutal vampire master. Lord Mason must proceed with great compassion to win Jessica’s trust and help her reclaim her life again. Of course that becomes increasingly difficult as he realizes she’s a natural submissive, and everything about her makes him want her for himself. Even though she understandably wants nothing else to do with vampires!

If you like strong, sexy non-whiny vampires, I hope you’ll give mine a try. Free excerpts, blurbs and reviews are available for all the books in the series on my website, www.storywitch.com under the Vampire Queen series link. Beloved Vampire is a triple Top Pick for Romantic Times, Night Owl Romance and ParaNormal Romance Reviews!

Would you like a copy? Make a comment, and we’ll choose a winner! (If you already have the book, I’ll let you substitute the title of your choice if you win- smile.)

Comments

Love your Vamps they're the best!!!! Dotty
(Dotty Brooker 8:33pm August 16, 2009)

I agree with some of your points. I
1) don't like whiny vampires and though I loved Twilight sometimes Edward was a little too whiny about his condition; still loved the books and the movie.
2) I'd prefer if they only fed from bad or diseased people other than for the pleasure with a loved one (without killing him or her)
3) No holds barred on eroticism is great!
Thanks for the chance of winning one of your books, I haven't tried one yet.
(Diane Sadler 9:30pm August 16, 2009)

Not just vampires, I don't like whiny werewolves either! Some say they are not whiny, but tortured souls...I don't think so, big difference!
(Susan Galley 9:55pm August 16, 2009)

There is definitely no whining in your stories, Joey,(thank you, thank you), and the eroticism and sensuality makes for memorable characters (love Dev) and stories. Especially love your vampire world and can't wait to read Mason's story.
(Cathy MacDonald 10:32pm August 16, 2009)

edward sucks. (PUN intended0
and im tryin to come up wit a name :)
is a limit to names?

i would love to win
(Tami Bates 11:18pm August 16, 2009)

Hooray! No whining! The angsty bit gets a bit annoying after a while.

Have you read the Undead series by Mary Janice Davidson? I love the Betsy character for wanting to change the vampire image.
(V Scott 11:20pm August 16, 2009)

I love most vampire books and movies, except when the vamp is too whiny or prissy. Your vampires don't sound like they would be either, so I know I will love the.
(Patsy Hagen 11:49pm August 16, 2009)

No whiney vamps it a good motto to have!
(Jessica Pando 12:13pm August 17, 2009)

Your books are great I agree with you about whiny vampires, but I also hate to read a book where the heroine is more manly than the hero.
(Sherry Strode 12:25pm August 17, 2009)

I would love to get this book.. still need the 3rd, but.
(Jo Ann Jansing 12:29pm August 17, 2009)

Ok, wasn't sure of the time limit. Love this series. I have a couple of your older works, but I think these are my favorites. Mason's sounds like a good story. Really looking forward to finding out what happens with Lyssa & Jacob, and Jacobs brother..that's going to be a really good one..
Thanks for giving us this world.
(Jo Ann Jansing 12:40pm August 17, 2009)

I have never read your books, but I think the idea of vampires can be very sexy. I would be intered in your books to read your take on them. Thanks!
(Laurey Martin 1:02am August 17, 2009)

I love vanpires have not read yours yet but have listed them in my list of books to get when I can.Have you read Christine Feehan I love her books I think you will like them.
[email protected]
(Stacey Smith 4:03am August 17, 2009)

Hey Joey!

Good thing I saw your newsletter right away. As I said in your blog, I loooooooove your work. Wish it were longer but oh well. I'll go bug your publisher now. lol!

I didn't care much for Louis. Liked Lestat. Loved Akasha though she has been replaced by Lady Lyssa as my all time fave vamp female lead. Won't ever touch Edward and the Twilight series and let the eroticism flow! *drool*
(Wendy T 4:46am August 17, 2009)

Hi, Joey! I would love to win a copy of BELOVED VAMPIRE. I read an excerpt, and I am quite intrigued! I watch "Angel" every morning before I go to work. David Boreanaz sure is fine! Thanks for the great reads.
(Virginia Campbell 5:54am August 17, 2009)

The reasons I didn't read vampire books for years are all of the things you consider no-nos. I can't wait to try your series, it sounds great.
(Mare Fairchild 7:58am August 17, 2009)

Hi Joey,
your books sound great (having trouble typing, it's hard to type around a cat laying on one arm) I haven't read them yet, but they sound right up my alley.
Don't care much for whiny kids so why would vamps be any different?
Sharon K
(Sharon Knight 8:40am August 17, 2009)

Oh I agree about "No whiny Vamps" and "No Holds Barred Eroticism". I look forward to reading your books Joey, they sound like great stories.
Carol L.
[email protected]
(Carol Luciano 8:53am August 17, 2009)

Add " not imposasible to kill" to the list and i'm in! Hard to kill is OK but when you have virtually no weaknesses (or if you glitter in the sunlight) I have no use for you as a vampire.
(Amy Thomas 9:00am August 17, 2009)

I love your vampires and would really love to win this one!
(Eva Silkka 9:06am August 17, 2009)

Thanks for all the great comments so far - love to respond to all directly, but here's just a few thoughts...

V Scott - I have read the first of MJ's Betsy series, and enjoyed it. I'm not a big humor reader (I love serious angst and tear jerking drama), so even though I know wonderful stories like hers and Janet Evanovich are outstanding humor romance, I usually can't do more than a book or two. I'm a stick in the mud!

Cathy M - you're referring to my newsletter contest (grin) - you can send me multiple emails with names if you think of new ideas after you send the original one, no worries.

Stacey, I have read many of Christine F's Carpathians - really like Dark Melody and Dark Fire, two of my favorites, on my keeper shelf!

Sharon, lol and amen to whiny kids - well said! I also know about the cat handicap when typing - we had to make a rule that my office is "no cats" during writing time, but pretty much everything else is fair game - they get even by smothering me at night when I sleep, lol.

Virginia, David B is QUITE fine, I agree. Loved Angel, loved him in Bones (though can't watch it anymore because they screwed with the characters this year and ruined it...grrr).

Kevin, lol - I don't think whiny vampiresses work for me either. Though I agree with Sherry - I like a strong female heroine, but I don't want her to be a guy in a girl's body, so to speak. Think that's why I liked how, in the opening of Vampire Queen's Servant, Lyssa is going to get her manicure/pedicure, even though she's 1000 years old and can pretty much decimate anyone.

Look forward to the other comments!
(Joey Hill 9:15am August 17, 2009)

I guess vampires are like the rest of us...some are whiny...some are assholes...some are just fun to be with.Its all about how seriously you take yourself.Naming a vampire? How about Vinnie? Or looking at what baby names were popular when the vamp was alive? Bet in 10 years we have a ton of Jason and Emily vamps
(Debra Hanna 10:35am August 17, 2009)

Chuckle - Debra, good point! However, Cathy was referencing the fact I just sent out my monthly newsletter. This month's contest (in that newsletter) was asking my readers' help in naming a future planned vampire hero, because I'd accidentally given him a name redundant with secondary characters of other books. I'm giving away a free book in that contest, too, if you want to double your chances to win. Anyone who wants to participate, just jump over to my website (www.storywitch.com), click on the Subscribe to Newsletter link on the left gold bar menu, and once you go through that process, you'll get my latest newsletter. The contest there is open to August 31. You can of course unsubscribe at any time, no worries, and your email's not shared.
(Joey Hill 11:01am August 17, 2009)

I agree about the whining. Would love to read your new book.
(Annetta Stolpmann 11:22am August 17, 2009)

I'm with you, Joey! No whiny
vampires. To me, if they've
chosen to be one or born into
it-- they won't whine about their
losses or their good points. If
they were forced, depending on
how long ago it was- they
should have come to terms
with it. If not, they should've
walked into the sun.

I'm a big believer in not killing
your meal. How else can you
keep vamps a myth if they're
constantly killing people? It's
one of those, "hmmm"
moments that make you think.

As for the eroticism factor--
bring it on! I LOVE how you did
Lyssa/Jacob's story in making
it erotic and emotionally
binding. For me, it made being
a vampire not only sexy, but
upped the erotic and emotional
aspects with the balance you
provided.
(Cynnara Tregarth 11:50am August 17, 2009)

I'm new to this genre and would love to win this book.
(Sarah Keery 12:16pm August 17, 2009)

There's nothing like a sexy male vampire. Yum.
(Leslie Smith 12:42pm August 17, 2009)

The No Mandatory Killing of Food one made me laugh. The set up for your vampires really do make for an interesting moral dilemma for Jacob and must have been a tricky thing to have to handle as an author.
(G. Bisbjerg 12:53pm August 17, 2009)

I'm with you on all three counts. I've loved vampires for so long, that now that they're so popular, I'm afraid of what someone trying to cash in on all the hoopla has to say. Sounds like yours would be worth reading!
(Kelli Jo Calvert 1:16pm August 17, 2009)

How does a vampire tell the difference between evil or diseased blood and clean blood?
As to whining,what vamp wouldn't be depressed or even suicidal at some point? Normal life isn't a continual joyride. Life is full of ups and downs.
Also not everyone is the most beautiful or handsome. Why do vampires all seem to be beautiful or handsome?
And even though they can live a long time aren't there any vamps that are dumb as a post or poor? Ugly,dumb,and poor isn't sexy but is every vamp sexy?
If vampire society is shown as a whole then all of it should be shown not just the glitz. Where there is only a few vamps in a story then sexy is in. Readers want a seemingly realistic view in their fiction because otherwise it falls apart and that writer goes on the reader's not-to-be-read-again list.
That's my criteria for vampire (and other) fiction.
(Lorna Thomas 1:23pm August 17, 2009)

I don't have any of your books but from what I read on your website I can't wait for payday to start collecting them. I love anything Vampires, Werewolves, Shapeshifters, Demons or anything Parnormal.
(Jeanette Bowman 1:44pm August 17, 2009)

The book looks good. Can't wait to read it.
(Marjana Kaly 1:56pm August 17, 2009)

I love a series that I can
invest some time in and
revisit characters that I have
previously met. I love
revisiting a world where I
already know the rules(at
least most of the time)and
don't spend half of the book
trying to decide who the bad
guys and the good guys are.
I'd love to give your world a
spin.
(Lisa Richards 2:29pm August 17, 2009)

I've finished Beloved Vampire,
and it was a treat! I
definitely most enjoyed seeing
how you could make a dominant
vampire be gentle with
Jessica. And what it took him
to commit to her.
(Elizabeth Krentz-Wee 3:05pm August 17, 2009)

Love your books and agree with you about hating whiny vampires. I don't like it when they spend the whole time hating who they are. If I could never get sick, never grow old, and never die....I wouldn't be complaining.

I do have to leave this qoute from True Blood said by Bill since it's appropriate to today's post, "I'm a vampire, I'm supposed to be tormented."
(Jody Faltys 3:08pm August 17, 2009)

Jody, I love it! Good quote, indeed. Lorna, lots of good "no's" on your list as well. I think the theory on the beauty thing is that it's a way they attract their prey, the whole compulsion/seduction thing, though that too can vary from book to book. My vampires know the difference in bloods by exceptional scent abilities. While I don't have a problem with the occasional blue day (laughter), I just have a problem with a vampire whining all the time because they're a vampire. I'm kind of with Cyn on that one - if a vamp hates being a vamp so much, please go walk into the sun and be done with it (chuckle).

Thanks again, everyone - so many great comments thus far...I'm not sure when the contest cut off time is, but it's a one day thing, so just comment as soon as you can (smile).
(Joey Hill 3:34pm August 17, 2009)

I don't like whiny characters in any genre...unless they're killed off, ;-).

Wasn't Richard Anita's boyfriend in a couple of books before he got mixed up with Jean Claude and the Circus? That series has developed into a case of too much no-holds eroticism to the detriment of the story.
(Anne Muller 4:07pm August 17, 2009)

Ooh, I hate whiny vampires. It's like they should just kill themselves already if they are that unhappy. An eternal life is worthless if you're miserable.
(Denise Powers 4:50pm August 17, 2009)

I love to read all your books. Keep writing!!
(Diana Kirkwood 5:40pm August 17, 2009)

I love your vamp novels and the Nature of Desire series. All of the characters are always so complicated - I love that. Can't wait for Gideon's story.
(J H 6:12pm August 17, 2009)

Hi,Joey! I started out with "Angel" this morning. Now, I'm watching "Bones". David B. is still quite fine! Something about those tall, dark, brooding Vampires that makes a woman have wicked thoughts...
(Virginia Campbell 6:46pm August 17, 2009)

You are the Best Vampire writer as far as I am concerned. You make your Vampires MORE by being complex, unique and just so sexy. Gotta Love your books. Thanks for filling our thirst for Vampires.
(Shirley Sego 6:49pm August 17, 2009)

I don't like whiny heros or heroines in books. Your vampire series looks to be a good read.
(Michelle Anderson 7:16pm August 17, 2009)

I will have to give your Vampire books a try. Your explanation of their character traits makes me want to see how they interact.
(Rosemary Krejsa 7:36pm August 17, 2009)

Whiny vampires....how sexy is that? NOT! I mean really. I don't like whiny regular men, what makes a writer think I would like a whiny vamp?

I want a vamp to suck my blood as part of the hot erotica and to be taken to the next level of boom chicca boom boom! (Damn, that sounds like an old porno there for a minute!)

I loved this blog!
(Tami Winbush 8:22pm August 17, 2009)

I don't like a whiny anything! That is the biggest turn off ever.
(DeeAnn Szymanski 8:30pm August 17, 2009)

I like strong vampires, but I also like them to be romantic. Now, that's not a contradiction.

bgcchs(at)yahoo(dot)com
(Benita Glickman 9:41pm August 17, 2009)

Tami, the boom chicca boom boom comment made me laugh out loud (grin). And I agree, Benita - romantic and strong go together just fine. Anne, yep, when I was reading the series, Anita was somewhat dividing her time between Richard and Jean-Claude - I was all for a lot more threesomes between that trio, but Anita was always having angst over that idea, thinking she had to choose (boy, let me step into her shoes for few minutes - ha!)
(Joey Hill 9:55pm August 17, 2009)

I agree, no whiny vampires. I do like romance in the vampire stories. Not just blood and gore.
(Linda Henderson 10:38pm August 17, 2009)

I love all your vampires and their servants, thanks Joey
(Kelly Morris 11:03pm August 17, 2009)

Your Vampires sound really interesting and I would like to read more about them. I like all the different kinds of Vampires out there now but definitely no whiny ones for me either!
(Dena Walton 11:41pm August 17, 2009)

Vampires are very much the thing
right now. I work at a small library
and have requests for more series all
the time. Haven't seen yours yet, but
will have to check it out. Since the
Anita Blake series is popular, yours
should be also.
(Patricia Barraclough 11:55pm August 17, 2009)

Fabulous thus far!! Whiny is SO unattractive. Don't eat where you piss - as it were. (Mind my French). Eroticism needs to be hot, hard & heavy. Cheers!!
(Mary Preston 1:25am August 18, 2009)

Dark Shadows was my fave in vampire shows...loved the chemistry between the actors...
(Darci Paice 1:30am August 18, 2009)

I agree with all your points especially no whiny vampires! :) I haven't read any of your series yet, but would like to some day. Do they have to be read in order?
(Anna McKenrick 1:30am August 18, 2009)

I'm late, but I wanted to say
I am NOT a fan of vampires and
I LOVE LOVE LOVE Joey W.
Hill's vampires.
She's one of the few authors
who has shown the kind of
eroticism others don't.
I have loved this series and
Mason is AWESOME!!! I'm
waiting with anticipation for
the next one.
(Jennifer Leeland 9:12am August 18, 2009)

I love your vampire books, they're great!
(Lisa Alugaili 9:52am August 18, 2009)

I have yet to read your series, but plan to! I am a bit different, I LOVE humor in my stories, just not all the time! But I agree, NO WHINING ALLOWED! My mama said no whining, and I apply that to everything in my life, including my books!
(Anne Harris 10:09am August 18, 2009)

Books sounds fantastic!! I agree with No whining, especially with vampires!!
(Judy Cox 10:54am August 18, 2009)

I just finished Beloved Vampire cannot!!! wait to read all Joey's other books.
(Shannon ONeill 10:54am August 18, 2009)

Anna, Vampire Queen's Servant and Mark of the Vampire Queen need to be read in order, because Jacob and Lyssa's story is essentially one big book divided into two titles. However, Vampire's Claim and Beloved Vampire are standalones - you can read them in any order, and before or after the first two. Hope that helps!

Patricia, hope you'll feel the series is a good fit for your library - don't know what the erotic threshold is at your library, but mine are considerably more hardcore than LKH's - just a warning (grin).

Jennifer, thanks for that resounding endorsement - have loved all the comments here - nice to find so many anti-whiny vampire fans.
(Joey Hill 3:45pm August 19, 2009)

After reading the excerpt, I definitely want to read this book but I sure would love to win a signed copy. Thanks,
Lorraine
[email protected]
(Lorraine Larose 12:18pm August 20, 2009)

i have teens, i dont want whiners. i have plenty of that. i like stron or funny tye or both stron and funny , ::::))))
(Tami Bates 3:21pm August 20, 2009)

Joey I LOVE vampires but never placed the quote by Tom Cruise’s Lestat. Now I can stop wracking my brain about that title. Good luck with this book.
(Susan Lathen 2:06pm August 22, 2009)

A whiny vampire -- puh-lease! The whole point of being a vampire is to be cool, arrogant, and alpha please! Which is why we love all of *our* vampires Joey!

And I would lurve to win Mason's story. Thanks for the contest!
(Deborah Elman 4:05pm August 22, 2009)

oops - ff stole my "y", that's supposed to be *Your* vampires ;-)
(Deborah Elman 4:06pm August 22, 2009)

How would a whiny vampire survive? They wouldn't last past the first few feeds.....

For an alternate name, how about Macon (it's Hebrew and I think it means "maker")?

Love your books.... I was hooked from the start.
(Liz Madill 11:11am August 29, 2009)

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