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Sex, Lies and Internet Dating by Marilyn Brant...

Today—January 28, 2013—is the 200th birthday of the publication of Jane Austen's PRIDE AND PREJUDICE. That novel just so happens to be my favorite book ever written, not the least of which is because of the fabulous dialogue and the sexual tension between the story's famous hero and heroine: Darcy and Elizabeth....

In honor of Jane's literary masterpiece, I just released my seventh novel this month, a contemporary romantic comedy called PRIDE, PREJUDICE AND THE PERFECT MATCH. It's a modern, original story with an Austen twist about a single mom and an ER doctor who meet on an Internet dating site—each for reasons that have nothing to do with finding their "perfect match"

Beth Ann Bennet is an aspiring social worker who is using an online alias to study sex–role stereotypes. Meanwhile, Dr. Will Darcy isn't exactly looking for love either. He's just trying to fund his clinic by winning a bet against a rich that'll net him a few million dollars if he succeeds....

The tagline I wrote for the story—Pride, Prejudice and the Perfect Match: Where true love is just a fib and a click away—is one I came up with in a burst of inspiration a few years back. I never imagined the release of my book would coincide with one of our nation's biggest online dating scandals, namely the recent "Girlfriend Hoax" involving Notre Dame football star Manti Te'o....

Of course, I don't know what really happened behind the scenes in the Te'o situation, but I imagine further details surrounding the scam will emerge over time. However, I think the one thing that's been clear to everybody from the beginning is how incredibly easy it is for people to misrepresent themselves online. It takes only a few clicks to change your identity and create a fake persona. And, while my characters didn't use anyone else's photographs in place of their own images, it's certainly no trick in our high–sharing, social–media culture to snag a snapshot from an acquaintance's Facebook page or to text a message to a stranger and pretend to be someone of the opposite gender....

In my case, when I was single, I met my husband by chance at a local restaurant when a couple of our individual friends randomly started chatting. I studied his behavior in person (and I took a good look at his friends, too). We interacted only in the real world because, well, that was 20 years ago and the virtual world didn't exist as we know it. There was no Internet. No cell phones. We thought voicemail was high tech, LOL. ...

But do you remember those old ..."p...ersonals..."... ads that used to run in newspapers for men seeking women, women seeking men, etc.? Just because lying on the Web hadn't been possible a couple of decades ago, it didn't mean people weren't fabricating details about their interests, abilities and professions—not to mention being deceptive in their descriptions about their appearance. Perhaps we've all gotten a little too used to treating the virtual realm as if it were reality these days, but deceitful people always existed in the world... Jane Austen certainly knew that. After all, 200 years ago she created one of the most despicable liars in literary history: the charming but very cunning Mr. Wickham. Bet he would have made a few alterations to his online dating profile, if he'd had one!...

Have you ever answered a personals ad or tried online dating? If so, what did you think of the experience? If not, is it something you might be willing to try someday...or no?...

I'll give away two digital copies of my sexy November 2012 romance, HOLIDAY MAN, to two commenters on this post!...


"Brant couldn't have done a better job at pulling me into the story and keeping me hooked until the end. I loved how her work was different enough that I felt really out of my element at first, but then brought back to the themes of compassion, forgiveness and love that really hold Darcy and Elizabeth together. This was an amazingly smart move that left me more than satisfied at the end of this work. I liked this book so much that I delayed watching the season 3 premiere of Downton Abbey!!" ~Kimberly Denny–Ryder, Austenprose ...

"I love a story that gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside, and that's just what Pride, Prejudice and the Perfect Match did to me! I LOVED it! It's a perfect book to curl up on a couch with!" ~Candy M., So Little Time...

"Looking for an Austen–Inspired novel that's fast–paced, modern, and endearing? Well...the results of your online dating profile show that...Marilyn Brant's new novel is the "perfect match" for you! Heart–warming, tender, and sweet – Pride, Prejudice and the Perfect Match is a lovely tribute to Jane Austen and her masterpiece." ~Meredith, Austenesque Reviews...




59 comments posted.

Re: Sex, Lies and Internet Dating by Marilyn Brant...

Bo ok sounds great. Would love to win it. Thanks
(Amy Milne 12:03pm January 28, 2013)

Thanks for the giveaway! I LOVE finding new books by new authors!!
(Meghan Stith 12:10pm January 28, 2013)

love the cover, love the book, love to win
(Kimberly Hoefs 12:12pm January 28, 2013)

Amy, Meghan and Kimberly~
Thanks so much to all three of you for stopping by!! Glad you like the sound of the new book ;).
(Marilyn Brant 12:15pm January 28, 2013)

Never answered a personal add or tried online dating. Book sounds great
though, would love to win.
(Liesl Lane 3:48am January 28, 2013)

Now this is a book I'd love to read!! Thanks so much!
(Bonnie Capuano 5:12am January 28, 2013)

Looks like a good read.
(Lisa Fitzgibbons 7:07am January 28, 2013)

The book sounds great. I tried eharmony once and really didn't get much in terms of results. Had a few first dates but there are just too many people and a lot of accounts that they keep up wven when the person leaves the system.
(Pam Howell 7:50am January 28, 2013)

I've done the online dating while flying everywhere.
Actually after weeding out some major losers (believe me
there we a ton) I met quite a few really nice guys. One I've
actually been married to since 2006.
So, I guess it all depends on if you know what your actually
getting into. I knew I would come in contact with a bunch of
liars and such, but that came with the game of chance.
Your book looks like it's going to be a fun read.
(Billie Gaskill 7:56am January 28, 2013)

I have read many of your books and look forward to this one as well, thank you for keeping us entertained and reading.
(Deana Connelly 8:48am January 28, 2013)

Wow what a generous idea. A great author on your 7th novel giving us a chance to win. I really believe this is a well thought of book with the happenings of the real world. Hopefully we can gain insight & enlightenment from it. God bless you!
(Kathy Smith 10:38am January 28, 2013)

I met my hubby when I was 16 and in high school in 1989, WAY before the advent of online dating. LOL That said, I am happily married, so have no need for online dating or placing personal ads. If something were to happen to my hubby, I am not sure that I would want to date again, but, if I decided I did, I would have no problem with online dating.
(Angie Lilly 10:54am January 28, 2013)

Liesl, yeah, I haven't tried them either. Thanks so much for your kind comment about the book!

Bonnie and James -- thanks to you both!! I'm thrilled that the storyline interests you!

Pam, I hadn't realized that some of the sites would keep the profiles up even after someone left. Ahh, that's interesting, and I can see how it would make it pretty confusing to figure out who's really actively seeking and who isn't. Thanks for the insight!

BJ, wow!! Congratulations! Your relationship is one of the great success stories that so many wish for when they try online dating. I especially appreciate the way you shared your clear-eyed view of the situation, too. Making sure people know what they're getting into. Weeding out those who are truly a bad fit. But also realizing there are good guys/gals out there as well. I'm so happy it turned out so well for you!!

Deana, ohhh, thank you! I'm honored that you've read other novels of mine and have enjoyed them. Makes my day!!!

Kathy, what a sweet comment -- thanks so much! Many blessings to you, too :).
(Marilyn Brant 11:00am January 28, 2013)

Angie, just saw your comment appear! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on Internet dating -- you and I were in a similar situation in having met our spouses way before such a thing as online dating existed, LOL. But what I'm really impressed by is that you married your high-school sweetheart and are still happily together. That's *wonderful* and something worth celebrating!!
(Marilyn Brant 11:05am January 28, 2013)

I haven't tried either. The book sounds good, I'd love to read it.
(Wilma Frana 11:05am January 28, 2013)

Wilma, thank you! I really hope it'll be a story you'll enjoy :).
(Marilyn Brant 11:06am January 28, 2013)

There was no such thing as internet dating before I was married so I don't know anything about it but it must be nerve wracking to to it.
(Maureen Emmons 11:45am January 28, 2013)

I never tried a personal ad or on-line dating. I met my hubby 31 years ago before the internet too. Plus I was also 17 yrs old!

Sounds like a fun story. Thanks for the chance to win!
(Sue Galuska 11:57am January 28, 2013)

looks like a great book, thanks for the contest!
(Debbi Shaw 12:22pm January 28, 2013)

I have never used personal or on-line ads since I have been
married for a very long time! But, I do have a friend who
placed a personal ad and met the guy of her dreams! I just
feel that meeting in-person (hopefully through mutual friends)
is the best way to get to know the real person!
(Marguerite Guinn 12:31pm January 28, 2013)

No I have not tried online dating or personal ads... my sister has and boy has she met some oddballs out there. I do not know if it was just her choices, but I think she finally found a decent guy.
(Colleen Conklin 12:37pm January 28, 2013)

As I'm happily wed there is zero chance of my trying online dating though I am all in favour of meeting people online who have similar interests.
There are a fair few books now using Jane Austen as a heroine so she clearly still inspires!
(Clare O'Beara 1:07pm January 28, 2013)

I've been married since well before the days of internet dating. Several in my extended family have tried it, with mixed results. Thanks for visiting; your book looks good.
(G S Moch 1:14pm January 28, 2013)

I met my boyfriend when he moved in around the block from me. I've never had any desire to try online dating.
(Sandy Giden 1:40pm January 28, 2013)

I could never do online - first, I am not tech savy and secondly, I have seen enough on Dateline to make me stay clear... murphy's law tends to apply to me, so meeting someone that way would definitely be meeting my killer. Third, I am in a happy relationship.
I do have a friend that used match and has come up with a catch, after years of dating and meeting people, he finally found "the one".
(Carla Carlson 1:46pm January 28, 2013)

looks good .
(Kent Cook 2:09pm January 28, 2013)

Looks like a really good read..Thanks for the chance to win one..
(Tina Myers 2:11pm January 28, 2013)

I have never done on-line dating because like you it didn't exist when I met my husband. My son has tried it with varied results.
(Kathleen Yohanna 2:15pm January 28, 2013)

Maureen, I agree with you on how Internet dating must be tough on one's nerves!!

Sue and Debbi -- thank you both for your interest in the story!

Marguerite, I think there's a lot to be said for meeting in person, too, but I'm thrilled for your friend!! How exciting that she met someone so wonderful online!

Colleen, I've heard some wild tales from friends and relatives who've tried online dating, too. Not all of them were horror stories, but there were certainly some odd situations that came up!!

Clare, you're so right -- Jane Austen is the inspiration for many, many writers!! Sometimes it's the characters she created, sometimes the plotlines and, on occasion, Jane herself will make an appearance in another author's novel. I'll admit, I did that once myself with my debut book, According to Jane :).
(Marilyn Brant 3:36pm January 28, 2013)

G S - there are many friends I know who've had mixed results, too. And thank you for taking time to comment!!

Sandy, how lovely that you met someone who lived so near to you! That's just wonderful :).

Carla, I had to laugh at your reference to Murphy's Law -- yeah, that would probably be true for me, too!! Glad to hear your friend found some success with online dating, though!

Kent and Tina -- many thanks to you both for your comments! I hope it'll be a book you'll enjoy :).

Kathleen, I'll be curious to see online dating is something my son will try someday as well. So many teens and 20-somethings now are so used to using technology in their dating lives. That definitely hadn't been true for me back then!
(Marilyn Brant 3:45pm January 28, 2013)

I've never dated online. I used to peruse the ads in the
paper when I was a teen. They still have the wanted ads in
the Indian news papers my Grandfather gets. I'll flip
though them now that I'm "of age and looking".

I have friends who have gone the online dating route and had
some really bad experiences and made life long friends too.
I guess the outcome is up to you and luck, much like any
relationship you have with someone you meet or know.
(Chanpreet Singh 4:01pm January 28, 2013)

My son used on-line to meet my daughter-in-law so I can't say
it is bad. She's a lovely gal and probably better than he
deserves. I'd like to read your book to see how this comes
(Mary Hay 4:14pm January 28, 2013)

I'm way past the age for online dating, though it might work for younger people. It certainly sounds better than going to bars to look for someone to date.
(Carol Woodruff 4:32pm January 28, 2013)

(Shelly Caggiano 4:41pm January 28, 2013)

I cringe at the thought of meeting someone in cyberspace and my dating days were over long before it came along. I did spend a goodly portion of my dating relationship exchanging letters with my husband to be though. I do have friends who met and fell in love through internet dating so I can't say that it doesn't work out for some people. I look forward to reading your books. Thanks for the giveaway opportunity.
(Sophia Rose 4:51pm January 28, 2013)

this book sounds very different and interesting !
(Gerry Sheets 5:35pm January 28, 2013)

No I never tried any of that but then my hubby's been my
sweetheart since high school.
(Theresa Norris 5:39pm January 28, 2013)

(Tracee Imai 6:40pm January 28, 2013)

I don't think that my husband of 50 years would be too happy if I answered a personal dating ad. HA!
With an inspiration of Pride and Prejudice, you book should be special.
(Marjorie Carmony 7:30pm January 28, 2013)

Chanpreet, I believe you are quite wise! Yes, it's all such a matter of one's own personality plus one's good (or not-so-good) luck. I like your outlook :).

Mary, how wonderful about your son and your daughter-in-law!! She must also really love knowing that you think of her so highly. I was fortunate to have a great relationship with my mother-in-law and considered our friendship to be a great gift!

Carol, LOL! Yes, I agree with you. To me, almost anything sounds better than the idea of trying to pick up someone at a bar!

Shelly, thank you! Glad you think the book sounds interesting.

Sophia, wonderful to see you here! Thanks for taking time to visit me :). As for letters, I used to write a lot of them to boyfriends in the days before I met my husband. Alas, he was NOT a letter writer (!!), so it was a good thing that we could get together in person.

Gerry, many thanks! I'm so glad you think so.

Theresa, it must be such a fabulous thing to have had so many shared memories with your husband, going back to high school! That's wonderful ;).

Thanks for the smilie, Tracee!!

Marjorie, LOL!!! I've been married only 20 years, but I'm quite sure my husband wouldn't be any more pleased by that idea than yours :). Many blessings to you as well!
(Marilyn Brant 8:06pm January 28, 2013)

Your books sound so fun. Mt friend did online dating and actually met a
really nice guy. He is normal and they have been together for a year now. I
don't think I would try it, but never say never. Sorry my hubby says I will
never, lol
(Ann Sheiring 8:21pm January 28, 2013)

I don't think that I would ever try online dating because I've read too many stories where the man has turned out to be a rapist, or worse!! Today's world is not the same as it was when I was first dating, and you could trust a guy more than you can today. You really can't trust people the way you used to, or should I say that you have to be more careful. I've been on other sites, though, and have met some wonderful people of both sexes. There is one man in particular who wanted to come and meet both my Husband and me. He lives in another country, and we had been talking on line for a couple of years. I invited him to my house, and we had a wonderful time. I don't do that with just anyone. I'm very cautious as to who I speak with, and screen them in my own way. I have friends that I speak to on the phone as well, and hope to meet in person in the near future. As for dating sites, I don't trust them. To end my thoughts, I've never read Pride and Prejudice, although I hope to take it out one of these days, but would love to read your book very much. It sounds like a great read for this time of year. I love the cover, and with all of the great reviews, I'm sure I'd be more than pleased!! Have a Happy and Healthy New Year!!
(Peggy Roberson 9:08pm January 28, 2013)

Ann, thank you for your comments! And I'm delighted to hear that your friend has found happiness with man she met online. I so enjoy hearing the success stories!!

Peggy, I completely agree with you on the necessity of everyone being REALLY careful when it comes to meeting people through the Internet. But I'm also glad you've made friends online and had the joy of meeting them in person and finding them as genuine in the real world as in the virtual one! I've been fortunate that way, too. In my case, almost all of those I later met were writer or reader friends, but I was delighted to know that books brought us together and that we had even more in common in person. Thanks for you kind comments about my book, too!! I truly hope it'll be a story you will enjoy ;). All the best for 2013!
(Marilyn Brant 9:36pm January 28, 2013)

Many years ago, I actually met my first husband through a personal ad. Once I met him, we discovered we had friends in common, but as you said... what is presented up front is not always the truth of what you're getting. It took me 6 years to figure out the reality, but when I did, I RAN from that situation. Now, I'm nearly 13 years into my relationship with the man I've been married to for nearly 8 years (both anniversaries are 2/12). Dating that way works for some people, and my best advice is hold out until you really get to know the other person... no jumping in with the first sizzle.
(Donna Holmberg 10:25pm January 28, 2013)

Would love to win this! Thanks so much for the chance :)
(Ria Andrews 10:56pm January 28, 2013)

There are times I'm tempted to try online dating or personal ad. I do worry about meeting weirdos and a would-be stalker. I have to think more about this.
(Kai Wong 11:00pm January 28, 2013)

Love the cover. I would never try on line dating. Too many crazies out there.
Can't wait to read the book. Sounds entertaining.
(Mary Branham 11:19pm January 28, 2013)

I haven't tried either one. I wouldn't want to do online. I've known too many
people who have been burned. That's why I totally believe the football
(Penny Mettert 11:41pm January 28, 2013)

it looks great
(Janet Gould 11:43pm January 28, 2013)

Donna, that is tremendously wise advice! Just as you said -- REALLY get to know the other person. And I think that holds true no matter how you meet him or or off!! Thanks so much for sharing your story ;).

Ria, my pleasure! Thank you for stopping by!

Kai, I agree that it's definitely something to think hard about before trying it. You're right to want to be careful and know what you're getting into first.

Mary, thank you -- both for your thoughts on Internet dating and on your kind words about the book. I really hope you'll like it!!

Penny, I'm definitely reserving judgment about what happened to Te'o until we learn more. I do think it's possible he was badly set up, but I only know what's been reported by the media. I hope that the truth will come out in time and those who are innocent will be cleared, and those who are not will be exposed. It's got to be a complicated situation!

Janet, thank you!
(Marilyn Brant 12:10pm January 29, 2013)

I've never answered a personal ad or tried online dating.

I would love to read HOLIDAY MAN thank you.
(Mary Preston 5:14am January 29, 2013)

Mary, thanks so much!! I really hope it's a story you'd like :).
(Marilyn Brant 9:50am January 29, 2013)

I never have but a good friend did try on-line dating and has been with her significant other for two years.
(Mary C 9:12pm January 29, 2013)

Oh, that's wonderful, Mary! Thanks for sharing this. I'm delighted your friend met someone online that she's so happy to be with now.
(Marilyn Brant 9:17pm January 29, 2013)

I have heard so much about Pride and Prejudice, but have never read it. Your blog reminds me that I should do so..also your book.
(Gladys Paradowski 10:23pm January 29, 2013)

Gladys, thank you!! If my post encourages even one person to read Jane Austen's classic novel, I've done my job :). Pride and Prejudice is a work of pure genius, in my opinion. And, of course, I'm very pleased you're interested in my book, too!
(Marilyn Brant 10:47pm January 29, 2013)

It would be wonderful to read another book about a Miss Bennett and a Mr. Darcy. Or really even the first, as I have never - yet - read Pride and Prejudice with the original Elizabeth Bennett and Fitzwilliam Darcy. (I've read a Jill Mansell book featuring a Mr. Darcy - (An)Drew - and mention is made of one of the other characters thinking "Oh, so this is the dashing Mr. Darcy?" but I don't know which of the characters - if any - is Elizabeth or if part or all of the plot is a P and P retelling, because I haven't read the original.)
(Laura Albert 1:11pm January 30, 2013)

Laura, ohhh, I hope you'll give the original Pride and Prejudice a try sometime! It's a story that's so delightful and beautifully written -- I wish I could read it for the first time again ;). With my new book, you don't have to know Austen's P&P to follow it (it's a completely stand-alone project, not a sequel or a retelling), but there are some fun inside jokes for those who are fans of Jane!
(Marilyn Brant 1:44pm January 30, 2013)

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(Usman Baig 11:23pm April 30, 2013)

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