Interview with Julie Buxbaum

My friends are my lifeline. Let’s be honest, who else can you commiserate with when you’re having a bad hair day? Husbands just don’t get it. Not to mention, most of them are losing their hair anyway. All kidding aside, the special moments shared with friends are what get us through the most difficult times in life. Without them, we’d be lost.

Imagine then what it would be like if your best friend was murdered and you were left to pick up the pieces of her shattered life. This month’s Jen’s Jewels Julie Buxbaum does just that in her compelling new release AFTER YOU. Masterfully written, she makes the reader stop and think… how well do you really know the ones you love?

As part of this interview The Dial Press, a division of Random House, has generously donated five copies for you, my lucky readers, to win. So, don’t forget to look for the trivia question at the end of the interview. And as always, thanks for making Jen’s Jewels a part of your reading adventure.

Jen: Some of my readers may recognize your name as the author of THE OPPOSITE OF LOVE which has been translated into eighteen languages and opted to film by Twentieth Century Fox. Quite impressive for a first-time novelist! For those readers unfamiliar with your work, please tell us about your educational and professional background prior to becoming a novelist.

Julie: I sort of backed into my career as a novelist. I was a litigator before becoming a writer, but found myself completely unfulfilled. As part of a New Year’s Resolution, I finally got up the courage to quit my job and to start writing that novel I had always talked about. As for educational background, I went to the University of Pennsylvania, where I studied Political Science, Philosophy, and Economics, and then later graduated from Harvard Law School. Sadly, I never took advantage of the opportunity to study literature, which is something I have to confess I deeply regret. That said, I do think law school and practicing law has really informed my writing, both in good ways and in bad.

Jen: In your second release entitled AFTER YOU, you tackle the complexity of friendship, marriage, love, and the healing nature of literature. First of all, how did you arrive at the premise?

Julie: I was really interested in looking at the question of how well we actually know the people we love. I think my choosing the topic had a lot to do with where I was in my life at the time; I had just gotten engaged to my now- husband, and it suddenly occurred to me that a basic tenet of human relationships is the fact that we can never really know what goes on in other people’s heads. AFTER YOU provided the perfect opportunity for me to create a situation where one character—in this case Ellie—gets the unique opportunity to step into the life of her best friend, and see behind that opaque curtain.

Jen: Your main character, Ellie Lerner, is a typical thirty-something woman struggling to balance her marriage and professional career. Yet the unthinkable happens when her best friend Lucy, who is living in London, is murdered. Lucy’s husband Greg and her eight year old daughter Sophie are left behind to share their grief with Ellie. How is Lucy’s death a direct hit to Ellie’s fragility in her own perception of self-worth?

Julie: I think Lucy’s death is direct hit to Ellie’s identity. For better or worse, a lot of women find their self-worth and identity through their various relationships: mother, daughter, wife, sister, and best friend, whatever the case may be. As the novel progresses we learn that Ellie is in fact suffering a double loss, as she has lost a baby two years before the opening of the book. She doesn’t think of herself as a mother, feels her role as a wife is slipping, and now finds that she is completely lost without her best friend.

Jen: As the story unfolds, Ellie chooses to stay in London to help Sophie adjust to the cruel reality that her mother is gone forever. On the flipside, Ellie’s husband Phillip is left behind in the U.S. pining away for his wife. Why does she choose to box her husband out? Would it be fair to say that this decision is a deliberate move to run away from her life?

Julie: Absolutely. At first the reader is led to believe that Ellie is this incredible martyr, giving up everything to help the fragile and adorable Sophie. But as time goes on, the reader begins to suspect that the reality is much more complex than that. No doubt Ellie loves Sophie, and feels a real responsibility as her godmother, but there is also no doubt that Ellie is a woman on the run from her own demons.

Jen: As part of the healing process, Ellie chooses to read to Sophie her favorite childhood book, THE SECRET GARDEN. On a personal level, what significance does it have in your life?

Julie: THE SECRET GARDEN is by far my favorite book of all time. I must have read it at least two hundred times at this point. It’s the one book I turn to purely for therapeutic reasons. When I’m going through a rough time, its exploration of redemption and self-healing and magic always manages to restore me. In AFTER YOU, the book serves as a literary vehicle—Ellie and Sophie’s story very much mirrors the experiences of Mary in THE SECRET GARDEN—but it was also a great excuse to give readers the opportunity to revisit that great book.

Jen: In terms of the characters, what particular aspect of the book becomes the common bond that links these two wounded souls, Ellie and Sophie, together?

Julie: I think Ellie and Sophie both relate to Mary, the main character of THE SECRET GARDEN. She’s lost in very much way the two of them are. The book opens with Mary’s orphaning, and suddenly she feels unmoored and without a single friend in the world. I think this essential loneliness is something we all experience and some point or another.

Jen: Sadly, Ellie comes to learn that her best friend Lucy was not the person she thought her to be. Isn’t it so true that oftentimes, we put our dearest friends up on a pedestal only choosing to see their strengths and turning a blind eye to their faults? How was Lucy’s death an unforeseen opportunity for Ellie to take a step back and evaluate the authenticity of her personal relationships?

Julie: Ellie is given this extreme opportunity to actually get to know the deepest secrets (and insecurities too) of her closest friend. Although it is frightening to not be able to ever truly know those we love, I sometimes wonder if this is a blessing. Maybe it’s better to turn that blind eye as you say, or to put it more positively to allow for that added bit of mystery. We don’t like to be reminded that we all are, at the end of the day, flawed human beings. That being said, I don’t think Ellie’s relationship with Lucy was any less authentic despite Lucy’s secrets.

Jen: Tacking onto the last question, what was the most life-changing discovery she was forced to confront?

Julie: By seeing behind Lucy’s curtain, I think Ellie is forced to confront her own demons as well, and to own up to her own fears and inadequacies.

Jen: Without a doubt, Lucy’s husband Greg mourns not only the loss of his wife, but also the absence of his daughter’s mother. Why does he welcome Ellie into his home? Is she just a buffer due to his lack of parental know-how, or does he see her as an extension of Lucy?

Julie: What a good question. I don’t think he necessarily sees Ellie as an extension of Lucy; I think he is simply a man in over his head. He recognizes that he needs all the help he can get.

Jen: The subplot of Ellie’s parents and their marital woes lends to the issue of lack of stability in her core familial unit. What vulnerabilities are commonplace in all of their lives? Who is the strongest family member and why?

Julie: Certainly, Ellie has inherited the running gene from her mother. As for who is the strongest family member, I don’t know. They are each strong in their unique ways. It seems to me all families are their own bizarrely balanced ecosystems.

Jen: Without giving too much away, how does Ellie finally come to terms with the woman she has become?

Julie: This is a question that haunted me throughout the writing of AFTER YOU: what happens when we meet our adult selves and they don’t necessarily match our expectations. For Ellie, she no doubt experiences a sort of reckoning by the end of the novel, and a desire to do better, but whether she comes to fully accept the woman she has become is something I don’t really know. I am not sure how any of us ever gets there.

Jen: Let’s talk about your promotional plans. Do you have a website? Will there be a Reading Group Guide available for book clubs? Do you participate in author phone chats? And if so, how would my readers go about scheduling one?

Julie: I do have a website: www.juliebuxbaum.com so please come visit. You can download a Reading Group Guide for book clubs for both AFTER YOU and THE OPPOSITE OF LOVE. And I love to do author phone chats with reading groups! It’s such a fun way to connect directly with readers. I can be contacted via a form on my website or just by clicking the contact me link on the site—if you are in a book club, email me and we’ll set up a time to chat!

Jen: Are you currently at work on your next novel? And if so, what can you share with us?

Julie: I am at work on my next novel, but I am way too superstitious to talk about it this early. I always feel like discussing a work, particularly when it’s still in its infancy, can somehow jinx it. Completely irrational, I know.

Jen: Thank you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to chat with my readers. I absolutely loved AFTER YOU. What a fabulous read! Best of luck with the book tour! And, please stop by again soon.

Julie: Thank you so much for having me!

I hope you have enjoyed my interview with Julie Buxbaum. Please stop by your favorite bookstore or local library branch and pick up a copy of AFTER YOU today. Better yet, how would you like to win one? Answer the following trivia questions and you could be One of Five winners.

Name the title of Julie’s first book. Later this month, I will be bringing to you my interview with Fern Nichols, founder of Moms in Touch International. You won’t want to miss it.

Until next time...Jen