Hi guys! Thanks to the folks at Fresh
Fiction for inviting me!
I’m CJ Lyons, a former
pediatric ER doctor turned thriller writer and I love talking about the really
important things in life: namely, the best ways to kill someone and get away
with it.
So, given the winter holiday season, I thought I'd throw out a few ideas on
Homicidal Holiday Hazards.
1. O Tantebaum—not only do they make for excellent firestarters (arson, anyone?)
but think of the
possibilities of actually obtaining one. Imagine: deserted tree farm, you and
your victim far out of
sight of anyone else, it's getting dark, and there you are with hatchet and saw
in hand….or better yet,
cutting down and hauling a live tree is a great time to induce a heart attack
and given the holiday
rush, it probably would go undetected as the medical examiner would be too busy
to do more than a
cursory examination.
2. Auld Lang Sang—do you have any idea how easy it is to slip poison into New
Year's champagne or
eggnog? The possibilities are endless: antifreeze in a sweet drink, an overdose
of barbiturates or
sedatives in an alcoholic one….
3. Dradle, Dradle—holidays with all that candy and cheating on diets make for a
perfect time to
induce a diabetic coma in those old folks with fat life insurance policies.
Just swap out their "sugar"
pills or insulin for a few days, ply them with some gelt or candy canes and
pouf! There goes granny,
here comes the inheritance!
4. Up on the Rooftop--Hmmm….climbing up rickety ladders, hammer and nails and
aluminum
gutters and electrical lights, snow and ice all around—anyone else seeing a
great set up for
"accidental" electrocutions or slip and falls???
5. Over the Hills—all that ice and snow (for those of you in northern climes)
not to mention crazy,
hectic drivers all rushing hither and yon make for a perfect recipe for
disaster. Mix a slashed brake-
line with faulty power steering, add a little too much holiday cheer and voila!
And then there's always the cold and hypothermia and all the possibilities the
wilderness can offer us.
In the meantime, what's your favorite Homicidal Holiday Hazard?
I'd love to hear them!
CJ
PS: I feel honor-bound (the pediatric ER doc in me) to point out that the
holidays actually do pose a
very real risk, especially to children and pets. Clean up ALL remnants of
alcohol after parties before
you go to bed (kids tend to get up early and love sipping at all the left over
drinks and it only takes a
few swallows of alcohol to poison a little one) and please dress everyone warm,
even for short trips.
Always, always buckle up and have a designated driver! Happy--and
safe--holidays to all!!
About CJ:
As a pediatric ER doctor, CJ Lyons has lived the life she writes about in her cutting edge suspense
novels. Her
debut, LIFELINES
(Berkley, March 2008), became a National Bestseller and Publishers Weekly
proclaimed it a "breathtakingly fast-paced medical thriller."
The second in the series, WARNING SIGNS, was released January, 2009 and the third, URGENT CARE, in October,
2009. Contact her at http://www.cjlyons.net
12 comments posted.
My nephew says that his Homicidal Holiday Hazard is watching all those Christmas cartoons with his sick daughter. He has now moved up to reading Dr. Seuss
(Karin Tillotson 1:03pm December 9, 2009)
Sorry, I hit enter to go down a line and sent it off instead! Anyway. the Homicide would be him committing suicide!
(Karin Tillotson 1:05pm December 9, 2009)
All I could think of when I read this blog was, Oh my goodness I hope the crazies are not reading this:)
(Theresa Buckholtz 1:12pm December 9, 2009)
I laughed out loud at what you have written here. I could so easily imagine it. Brilliant!!
(Mary Preston 5:00pm December 9, 2009)
Needed a good laugh today and I'm so glad I read your blog.The wind today is quite the criminal, it's blowing everyones Christmas decorations off the lawn and the roof.
(Shirley Kulesza 6:55pm December 9, 2009)
It takes a doctor who has seen it all to show us how they've "survived by their wit"!! Congrats on your books..they keep us all intrigued! Jean M
(Jean Merriott 1:14am December 10, 2009)