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Rachelle Dekker | The Top Five Things I Learned from Ted Dekker
May 22, 2015
The most common question I get asked is, “What’s it like to have Ted Dekker as a
father?” I always smile and think about being forced to play “High - Low” around
the dinner table, watching motocross races on Saturday afternoons, and listening
to Dream Theater in the car. More than anything though, I think about the things
I’ve learned from him. There have been many lessons passed on, but some rise above the rest. So, here
are the top five things I’ve learned from Ted Dekker about writing and life in
general.
1. If you’re afraid of something, then it’s probably something you should do:
Running from fear was never an example set for me. It was more about running
into fear, realizing that you could be stronger than your fear, because of the
One that lives within you. Also, fear can be good indicators of calling… are you
afraid to write, afraid you'll fail, or that the world won’t accept you? Maybe
you’re afraid because that’s exactly what you should be doing!
2. When in doubt, kill someone: in a story setting of course! Pacing, for
those
that are Dekker fans, is something my dad has perfected. He always used to say,
“If a scene starts to feel slow then do something unexpected, and don’t be
afraid to whack a character.” I kid you not, whenever I am writing a scene that
drags I think, “Who can I kill here?”
3. Being strange is cooler than faking normality: My dad will tell you
that he
rarely felt like he fit in, and for a long time he tried to be “normal” and
failed. So he always displayed “being yourself” as cool, so that us kids never
suffered trying to be anything other than what we were. Authenticity is
contagious, and often times rare; don’t be afraid of it.
4. Sometimes doing stuff you don’t want is good for you: Mind over
matter, they
say. I can recall numerous times when my father faced something difficult or
that he didn’t particularly enjoy and he’d say “I’m doing this to prove to
myself I can.” Watching him do this helped me learn that I really am strong
enough to face whatever life hands me. Defeat is a choice, and sometimes that’s
okay, but it’s good to know I can chose victory in every situation.
5. I’m not your father, thank God: So of course he is my earthly father, but
parents aren’t perfect. They’re just like us actually, trying to discover who
they are, forgetting their identity, failing and stumbling. My dad always
emphasized that his love wouldn’t be perfect, but thankfully our actual Father’s
love is. We always have Him with us, guiding us, loving us, so that when I felt
like my earthly father had let me down, I could run to the One that calls me
daughter of the king. I am so thankful to know this, and pretty dang thankful
that Ted Dekker gets to be my father on this ride called life.
GiveawayReaders, what have you learned from your father? Leave a comment below to be
entered to win a copy of THE CHOOSING!
Like all citizens since the Ruining, Carrington Hale knows the importance of
this day. But she never expected the moment she’d spent a lifetime preparing
for—her Choosing ceremony—to end in disaster. Ripped from her family, she’ll
spend her days serving as a Lint, the lowest level of society. She knows it’s
her duty to follow the true way of the Authority.
But as Carrington begins this nightmare, rumors of rebellion rattle her beliefs.
Though the whispers contradict everything she’s been told, they resonate deep
within.
Then Carrington is offered an unprecedented chance at the life she’s always
dreamed of, yet she can’t shake the feeling that it may be an illusion. With a
killer targeting Lints and corruption threatening the highest levels of the
Authority, Carrington must uncover the truth before it destroys her.
The oldest daughter of New York Times bestselling author Ted Dekker,
Rachelle Dekker was inspired early on to discover truth through storytelling.
She graduated with a degree in communications and spent several years in
marketing and corporate recruiting before making the transition to write full
time. She lives in Nashville with her husband, Daniel, and their diva cat Blair.
Comments
22 comments posted.
Re: Rachelle Dekker | The Top Five Things I Learned from Ted Dekker
Marissa Yip-Young 5-22-15
(Marissa Yip-Young 5:55am May 22, 2015)
something learned from my father: It's nice to be important,
but it's more important to be nice.
(John Dallal 11:16am May 22, 2015)
I was the youngest of 3 girls, so that made me a Daddy's
girl. I grew up a good part of my life as a tomboy as well.
My Father taught me so much - more than I could put in this
box!! To narrow down a couple of examples, he taught me
about every tool and their use, as well as different sports
and everything having to do with their games. In keeping
with your theme, he taught me patience. I learned that if
there's a problem or project that I'm working on, have come
to a snag, and can't figure it out, to walk away for a bit,
then come back and try again. It usually works out. The
main thing he taught me is if I learned some bad news
regarding myself, such as a medical test, or have to have a
test run for some reason, for example, not to worry ahead of
time, because it's not going to change anything. It is what
it is. I've lived by that philosophy, have told other
friends the same thing, and they also live by that rule as
well. It saves a lot of grief. I'm looking forward to
reading your book. You have a great role model for
inspiration with your writing. Congratulations on your
book, and I'm sure it's going to do quite well!!
(Peggy Roberson 1:21pm May 22, 2015)
My dad always taught me to always be strong and sometimes
life is really hard and you just take it day by day and deal
with it. I was pretty sick growing up so he always helped me
to focus on the positive. He also taught me how to fish.
I would love to read your book Rachelle.
(Maryann Skaritka 4:07pm May 23, 2015)
My father taught me to work hard and never give up on my dreams.
(Bonnie H 8:51pm May 23, 2015)
be kind to everyone
(Jean Benedict 2:28pm May 24, 2015)
My father taught me to always be honest and to treat everyone like you would want to be treated.
(Joan Thrasher 10:50am May 25, 2015)
My father taught me a lot. The best memory of him teaching
me something is how to sled down a hill without getting
hurt! And it worked!!!! I LOVE my Daddy very much!
(Renae Kelly 5:18pm May 25, 2015)
My father taught me to love to read.
(Renee Grandinetti 9:25pm May 25, 2015)
Sorry, but I don't know much about this genre. And after reading what you
had said about your was touched. Curious about how you get ideas of "the
other world/realm" or whatever you want to call it. I guess I find it hard to
visualize it myself.
(Kantu Malhotra 11:56am May 26, 2015)
A lot to list, but for some reason him teaching me to keep notes is really sticking out today.
(Seanna Yeager 2:50pm May 26, 2015)
Words of wisdom from my father: Save your money, be kind to others, never get in debt, live fully & deeply.
(Nancy Ludvik 5:01pm May 26, 2015)
home repairs and a lot of curse words
(Angela Parrish 5:29pm May 26, 2015)
What I learned from my father was the dark side of alcoholism. I knew
from an early age that I would never drink and mistreat my family.
(Lettetia Elsasser 5:33pm May 26, 2015)
I have learned the beauty of hard work and to always follow my dreams and
never let anything stop me from accomplishing what I want to do!
(Lily Shah 6:06pm May 26, 2015)
I learned how to be a compassionate person.
(Nadine Stacy 7:28pm May 26, 2015)
Same here. Taught to be compassionate and have empathy. He
also taught me the same as far as diving into that we I feared
most.because we only fear the things we din't know about.
Carol L
Lucky4750 (at) aol (dot) com
(Carol Luciano 4:55am May 27, 2015)
My father taught me to have a sense of humor and follow through with my commitments. I love that old man. :)
(Maranda Hymes 5:02am May 27, 2015)
Well, I know this is going to sound bad but .... nothing. He
skipped out when I was very little.
(Val Pearson 7:36pm May 27, 2015)
Taught to me - When in doubt, keep your mouth shut. It usually works.
(Sharon Mitchell 3:15am May 28, 2015)
He taught me to love with all my heart, let the kids Occasionally have cup
cakes for breakfast, if it's been a bad day let your kids love up on you and
all your problems will melt away.
(Hillary Kaltenbach 12:10pm May 28, 2015)
My parents were separated when I was very young, so I did not have a relationship with my dad. He didn't even bother to send me a birthday card or Christmas card.
(Susan Patterson 3:34pm May 28, 2015)
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