This past January, I reached what is considered a much dreaded milestone in
life for many women...I turned forty. Honestly, it wasn't as bad as I had
expected. Sure, I have a noticed some fine lines and I guess I'm now supposed
to be reading More magazine instead of Glamour, but
all things considered, my life is pretty much the same.
In passing, a dear friend asked me if I had to choose, what would be my
greatest accomplishment thus far. Without skipping a beat, I replied, "My
sons." Isn't that the truth? Can you think of anything more life altering than
giving birth to another human being? I live and breathe for my boys, as does my
husband. There is nothing we wouldn't do for them and rightfully so. They are
our world.
With that being said, this month's Jen's Jewels, Barbara Delinsky, epitomizes the true meaning of love not only
through her writing, but also with the way in which she leads her life. And,
her latest release, The
Secret Between Us, touches upon our theme for the month...love. It's the
emotional story of a mother and daughter who are unexpectedly put into a
situation that tests the power of their love and ultimately changes their
relationship forever. As you know from her previous novels, Barbara's talent
for weaving an emotional drama is second to none. I truly think this novel is
one of her best.
As part of this interview, Random House Books has graciously donated
five copies to give-away to my readers. So, don't forget to look for the trivia
question at the end.
Go ahead and grab some chocolate (Valentine's Day is coming, so why not
treat
yourself to something sweet?) and get to know my friend, Barbara Delinsky.
Jen: After I completed my background research, I had to take a moment
to
reflect on the trials and tribulations that you have overcome. From losing your
mom at such an early age to being a breast cancer survivor, you have faced much
adversity and have come out such a vibrant human being ready to tackle life's
next challenge. So that my readers have a better understanding of your journey,
please give us a brief overview of your personal and professional background.
Barbara: I was born and raised in suburban Boston -- and, funny, I
don't see myself as having overcome trials and tribulations. Yes, my mother
died when I was eight, but my dad was still around, so my childhood was pretty
ordinary. I took piano lessons, flute lessons, and ballroom dancing lessons. I
spent summers at camp, then, when I was sixteen, learning how to type and to
drive. Soon thereafter, I was kicked out of Honors English because I couldn't
keep up! Still, I earned a B.A. in Psychology at Tufts University and an M.A.
in Sociology at Boston College.
Following graduate school, I worked as a researcher with the Massachusetts
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children, and as a photographer and
reporter for the Belmont Herald. I did the newspaper work after my first son
was born. Since I was heavily into taking pictures of him, I worked for the
paper to support that habit. Initially, I wrote only in a secondary capacity,
to provide copy for the pictures I took. In time, I realized that I was better
at writing than photography.
I became a professional writer by fluke. My twins were four when, by chance,
I
happened on a newspaper article profiling three female writers. Intrigued, I
spent three months researching, plotting, and writing my own book - and it
sold.
Today, my novels are character-driven studies of marriage, parenthood,
sibling
rivalry, and friendship. I've also put together a book on breast cancer, which
I have survived as my mother did not. This book, Uplift: Secrets From the
Sisterhood of Breast Cancer Survivors, is a handbook of practical tips and
upbeat anecdotes that I compiled with the help of 350 breast cancer survivors,
their families and friends. The entirety of my proceeds from this book has gone
into my charitable foundation, which funds an ongoing research fellowship at
Massachusetts General Hospital. I gotta tell you. It doesn't get any better
than that.
Jen: As you have said, writing was really not on your agenda as a
profession of choice until you read an article about three female writers and
then decided to take a stab at it. Please take us through your writing process.
Plot first? Characters? What is the most essential piece to constructing the
story? And most importantly, typically how much research goes into each novel?
Barbara: The process of my writing has evolved over the years.
Most
often now, the premise comes first -- in the case of The Secret Between
Us, "Mom lies for daughter, and it backfires." Then I start sketching out
characters -- giving them backgrounds and personalities. At the same time, I do
my basic research, and that varies by the book. I worked with geneticists for
Family Tree and with accident lawyers, family doctors, and optometrists for The Secret Between Us.
Once that's done, I jump right in and actually eke out the first three
chapters. These early pages are so crucial (and difficult) that I spend more
time on them than on the rest of the chapters combined. By the time they're
done, though, I finally know my characters enough to proceed. That's when I do
in-depth plotting and outlining. I have to ensure that the story sticks to the
central theme(s) I've chosen, that the emotional progression is correct, and
that each and every scene furthers the plot. By the way, when the book is done,
I go back and cut as much as ¼ of what I've written. That's for tightness and
pacing, and, as painful as it is, it is crucial.
Jen: If you had to describe your niche in this business, what would it
be? What makes your writing so different and appealing that it keeps readers
coming back for more? (I am one of those readers, by the way.
Barbara: I write about the emotional crises that we face in our
lives. Readers tell me that they identify with my characters. They know them.
They are them. I'm an everyday woman writing about everyday people facing not-
so-everyday challenges. And believe me, I love readers like you to bits. I've
built my career one reader at a time. I owe a dept of gratitude to you all!
Jen: Has there been a defining moment in your career when you have
taken
a step back and have thought to yourself that yes, your work has made a
difference in this world? If so, what has proved to be the most meaningful and
why?
Barbara: The defining moment would be when I realized that my name
was recognizable enough for me to be able to help women with breast cancer. The
result was my non-fiction book, Uplift: Secrets From the Sisterhood of Breast Cancer. My success
as a novelist made this book possible, and the fellowship funded by the
proceeds of this book is training now doctors in research that will hopefully
lead to a cure.
Jen: The first book of yours that I read was Looking for Peyton Place
which I selected for my thirty-something book club. We all loved it and wound
up checking out all the other titles we had in the library! In your latest
release, The Secret Between
Us, you once again shed a different light on an event that could happen to
any of us. How did you arrive at the premise?
Barbara: This is one of those plots that's been tossing and
turning
in my mind for years. I remember Grace Kelly. I remember how
she died. I remember that her fifteen-year-old daughter was with her in the car
that fateful day, and that the girl acted out for years afterward. The official
story is that Grace suffered a stroke while she was driving. But the
psychologist (and mom) in me always wondered whether the daughter was actually
the one at the wheel. If so, her misbehavior would be understandable, given the
guilt she would have felt. Not that I blame her father, Prince
Ranier. With Grace dead and Stephanie having her whole life ahead, I'd
have made the same choice...
And so The Secret
Between Us was born. The scenario is slightly different, but the premise is
the same: What happens when a lie, told with the best of intentions, goes
wrong?
Jen: What I love best about your characters are the multi-layered
facets
of their personalities. Readers can easily relate to them and thus feel a
connection to their story. What are your main character Deborah Monroe's
strengths? Weaknesses?
Barbara: Deborah is an amazingly adept woman. She is a skilled
doctor
with a family practice, an active single mother, a caring sister and daughter,
and a devoted friend. Those are her strengths -- things we all admire.
Her weaknesses? She needs a life plan. She's always had one, and it did follow
its preordained course until her marriage fell apart. She didn't plan on that,
and may not have handled it well. Then comes the accident. She didn't plan on
that, either, and clearly didn't handle it right. How to confess to having made
a huge mistake? How to accept that we can't plan out our whole life?
Jen: Deborah Monroe's daughter, Grace, must comes to grips with the
reality of what she has done versus disappointing the one person in her life
who has never let her down, her mother.
Who really is to blame? Grace or Deborah ...and why?
Barbara: I think, here, that you've actually hit on another of
Deborah's weaknesses, and it's a case of history repeating itself. Much as her
father had expectations for her, she has expectations for her own kids,
especially for her daughter. Just as, in the aftermath of the accident, she has
to make her father understand that she isn't him, she has to accept that
what was right for her may not be right for her daughter.
Jen: Without giving away too much of the plot, which part of the
story
was the most enjoyable to write and why? Which part was the most challenging
and why?
Barbara: The accident was enjoyable to write because it was high
drama, and I love writing that. Same with the climactic emotional scene between
in the alley between Deborah and Grace. Here is mother-daughter angst at its
best. The most challenging was probably the ending, because I was squirming
right along with Deborah, wondering if she was finally getting it right.
Jen: What message, if any, are you sending to your readers by writing
this book?
Barbara: I hate to think I'm sending a message, but if there is
something I want readers to take away from The Secret Between Us it
has to do with imposing our own expectations on those we love. Aiming high is
wonderful, as long as the person doing the aiming has chosen the goal that is
right for him or her.
Jen: What has surprised you most about the publishing business and
why?
Barbara: It's a business. Whoa, is it a business -- and with each
year, it becomes more so. The days when a good book would succeed purely
because it's good are gone. Now, for an author to be successful, she must be
willing to get involved in things like websites, podcast production, and phone
meetings with book groups. She also needs to be able to communicate with her
readers. This is all time consuming and takes time from actually writing a
book. I know some writers far more talented than I, who have stopped writing
because they couldn't handle that.
Jen: As I mentioned earlier, you are a breast cancer survivor. For
those
readers not familiar with your Uplift: Secrets from the Sisterhood of Breast Cancer Survivors
book and handbook, please tell us a little bit about them.
Barbara: Uplift is the book I wished I'd had when I was diagnosed
with breast cancer. Yes, I tell a little of my own experience, but mostly this
book is comprised of snippets of wisdom and wit sent to me by 375+ breast
cancer survivors, their families, friends, and co-workers. It tells those newly
diagnosed things that their doctors don't know, somatic things, personal
things. AND it is not frightening. There is no medical talk in this book. It is
simply secrets shared between sisterly friends.
Jen: Please tell us about your website. Do you have email
notification
of upcoming releases? Do you participate in a blog? Are you available for
author phone chats? And if so, how would my readers go about scheduling it?
Barbara: My website, barbaradelinsky.com, is filled with content -- but hey,
I've
written a lot of books! There is information on all my books, bio material,
info on writing, info on Uplift. Yes, there is a blog. And yes, there is a
contact page for sending me notes and signing up for my mailing list. I respect
my readers' time and privacy, and therefore try not to inundate them with
eblasts, but I do send notices when new books come out, when I'm sponsoring
contests, or when the first chapter of an as-yet-unpublished book is posted.
And yes, I do phone chats. To schedule one, readers simply need to send a note
through my contact page. So... the website is at www.barbaradelinsky.com , and the
contact page is at www.barbaradelinsky.com/delinsky-contact.htm.
Let me say here, too, that I answer every note readers send!
Jen: Are you currently working on your next novel? If so, what can
you
tell us about it?
Barbara: The title is While My Sister Sleeps, and
it's the story of a family tragedy that helps a young woman find her voice.
Enough said for now ...
Jen: It has been an honor to be able to interview you, Barbara. I
think
I speak for many when I say that you truly are an inspiration to everyone you
have touched whether it be through your words or your works of love. Best of
luck in 2008!
Barbara: Thank you, Jen. Believe me, I have been touched in
turn by my readers -- and blessed that they care enough to want to read more!
I hope you have enjoyed my interview. If you haven't picked up anything for
your mom for Valentine's Day, why not buy her a copy of The Secret Between Us? I
guarantee that she'll love it! Better yet, would you like to win a copy? Okay,
answer the following question. Good luck!
Name the
title of
Barbara's book about breast cancer.
Next time, I am stepping out of my comfort zone of romance and women authors
and bringing to you an interview with a phenomenal military suspense author
named John Lescroart.
You won't want to miss it!!
Happy Valentine's Day....Jen
10 comments posted.
The answer to the trivia question is UPLIFT Secrets from the Sisterhood of Breast Cancer Survivors.
I LOVE your books Barbara! My favorite so far has been FAMILY TREE, because it combined my two favorite things, a great story and knitting.
(Kay Martinez 10:25pm February 6, 2008)
Barbara is one of my favorite authors. I think I have read every book. I am still waiting on the new one from my book club. Dying to read it.
Keep giving us such great books
(Mary Branham 1:30pm February 29, 2008)
Just received my copy of Secrets Between Us( the book clubs are so slow now to send out the new books, they are always backordered) and I am ready to get some chocolate and a cup of tea and start reading. Love your books. Can't wait for the next one.
(Mary Branham 1:56pm March 24, 2008)
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