โAll done.โ Nancy held out the box containing the cake as Connor opened his
front door. It was six oโclock on Friday evening and pregnant Pamโs leaving
party at the Lazy B was due to start at eight.
โBring it on inside. Here, let me give you a hand.โ As he took the pink and
white striped box from her, Connorโs hands brushed against her own and the by
now familiar zapping sensation shot up Nancyโs arms. Was this something sheโd
ever get used to?
โYay! Letโs see it.โ Mia, clearing a space on the kitchen table, said bossily,
โCome on, Dad, take the lid off.โ
Connor paused, looked at Nancy. โWhat if I donโt like it?โ
โDonโt worry. Iโll just go away and quietly commit suicide.โ
โFine, but where would we get another cake at such short notice?โ
โOh, get on with it,โ Mia exclaimed, briskly removing the lid. โBloody hell,
Nancy, itโs all broken.โ
โWhat?โ Nancy stopped gazing helplessly at Connor and spun around so
fast she got a crick in her neck.
โHa, got you.โ Mia beamed at them both.
โHey,โ said Connor, studying the cake. โThatโs amazing. Youโve done an
incredible job.โ
Praise from Connor was like warm honey trickling down her spine. Basking in the
sensation, Nancy watched him examine the more intricate details of the cake. She
wondered if putting on perfume to bring it over to his house had been a mistake.
Then she thought maybe not as Connor put an arm around her shouldersโyes,
yes!โand said, โYouโre a clever old stick, arenโt you?โ
The warm honey abruptly vanished. Stick? Clever old STICK? What kind of
an endearment was that when it was at home?
โIgnore him.โ Sensing her alarm, Mia said consolingly, โItโs just one of those
stupid things Dad says. He called me that once. So I called him a fat old fart,โ
she remembered with satisfaction. โThat soon put a stop to it.โ
โPlease donโt try that.โ Connor turned to Nancy. โIโm sorry. I just meant you
were clever. You donโt look a bit like a stick. Anyway, weโd better be getting
ready.โ He nodded at Mia. โDโyou have it?โ
Mia patted her jeans jacket pockets, found what she was looking for.
Embarrassed, Nancy said hurriedly, โI told you, I donโt want any money.โ
โIt isnโt money,โ said Connor.
โOh.โ
โHere.โ Mia handed Nancy a laminated card. โNow youโre a member of the Lazy B.โ
Overwhelmed, Nancy took the card. โYou donโt have to do this.โ
โHey, wasnโt I saying just the other day that you should come along to the
club?โ Mia, whose idea it had been, was looking delighted with herself. โWell,
now youโll have to.โ
Nancy turned the card over. Oh God. โYou really didnโt have to do
this.โ Horrified, she gazed at the photograph of herself, purportedly
there for identification purposes. This one, taken almost ten years ago, showed
her with overplucked eyebrows, a truly hideous perm, and the startled look of
someone perched in a photo booth, unsure when the flash might be about to go
off. Excerpt that she hadnโt been in a photo boothโsheโd been at one of Spike
and Carmenโs parties.
โI asked Carmen yesterday for a picture of you,โ Mia explained. โSee? All planned.โ
Nancy said wryly, โAnd to think she used to be my friend.โ God, even her
passport photo wasnโt as awful as this.
โYou can have another one taken at the club. Weโll do you a replacement card.โ
Connorโs tone was consoling. โHey, look on the bright side. At least youโve
improved with age.โ
โThanks.โ Nancy forced herself to smile; he probably didnโt mean to imply that
these days she looked passable, whereas back then sheโd been a complete
dog.
โAnyway, I like curly perms; my aunties all used to have them.โ
โDad.โ Mia gave him a pitying shake of the head. โYou arenโt doing yourself any
favors, you know.โ
โArenโt I?โ Connor turned to Nancy. โArenโt I? Am I getting it horribly
wrong?โ
โNow you happen to mention it,โ said Nancy, โyes.โ
โBugger, Iโve lost my blarney.โ He clutched his forehead, looked tortured. โIโm
sorry. I donโt know where itโs gotten to.โ
โTry looking down the back of your sofa,โ Nancy suggested. โWhen we lose
anything, thatโs where it usually turns up.โ Reading herself to leave she said,
โAnyway, thanks for the membership. Maybe Iโll give the club a try over the
weekend.โ
โCome with us tonight,โ Mia exclaimed. โWeโll be leaving here in half an hour. I
can give you the guided tour, introduce you to people. And youโll see Pam
getting her cake. Fancy that?โ
Nancy hesitated, glanced at Connor to see his reaction.
โOf course, you must come with us.โ Connor clutched her arm. โThatโs a great
idea. Why didnโt I think of it?โ
โProbably because youโre losing your marbles along with you blarney.โ Mia
flashed him a sunny smile. โIโll be having to put you in a home soon.โ
โHow about it then, Nancy? Are you free?โ said Connor.
Nancy was having trouble concentrating; the electrical currents were still
zip-zapping excitedly up and down her arm. Gathering herself, she said, โIโm free.โ
โGreat.โ Connor looked pleased.
Mia winked at her and Nancy blushed, suspecting that she and Connor had both
just been expertly set up. Mia was clearly a girl with a plan.
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