Just wanted to say thanks so much for all your comments and for sharing so much of your challenges with me. I am deeply touched, and I hope and pray that something in DEADLY TIES will touch your heart and your life in a positive way. One thing is very clear. We're all in the same boat! We all have to make those tough calls. If you want to chat about them, I hang out on Facebook a lot at vicki.hinze.author and of course, you can always reach me here at Fresh Fiction! Blessings, Vicki
Leah, dahlink, I'm going to be frank. I just saw this post of yours, and first, I'm sending you a huge virtual hug. Second--and, yes, this is experience talking--I want to share with you that we should never forget our sorrows, disappointments, lost loves/parents or rough times.
Oh, it'd be pleasant to be unblemished, that's true. But those scars make us who we are. Because we've known sorrow, we are more compassionate. Because we've been disappointed, we try not to disappoint. Because we've endured lost love and lost parents, we know what precious treasures they are and that we can pass forth to our kids. That we can embrace when we courageously love again--and it is courageous because we're not ignorant of loss. We know the pain, and yet dare to love again anyway.
In remembering our parents, we remember what it is like to not be orphaned. All the good in them, or the things they taught us. Their quirks, loves, hates. We remember and so they're not lost, Leah. I hope when I'm gone someone remembers me.
I walked through a cemetery once many years ago and saw a tombstone. On it the family had written, "She was the sunshine of our home." Sunshine was my mother's nickname for me. It stuck in my mind and really did a lot to shape the kind of person I wanted to be. Even difficult people in our lives offer something worth remembering. What we don't want to do or be is as important as what we do, you know?
There is honor in the scars, Leah. That's what I'm trying to say. They make us stronger and wiser and more loving--if we let them. That's when we remember, take the good and put the rest into the past where it belongs. We let it rest.
It's kind of like a windshield and rear view mirror. The rearview is small because we need to see what's behind us, where we've been. But the windshield is huge because we need to focus on where we're going.
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