Tanned, toned, blonde and gorgeous -- just a few of the
characteristics that describe the Grammy-winning pop duo,
the Sparks Sisters. These barely legal twins have another
not-so-secret trait -- they were born conjoined at the
spine. Flora and Fauna Sparks have shot to the top of the
charts with their tongue-in-check dance hits, Love Will
Tear Us Apart, Cutting You Loose and I'm Beside
Myself. With their 18th birthday looming and their
first foray into adulthood, is there anything these pop
princesses can't do?
Celebrity journalist Sloan Madden has been hand-picked to
write the twins' upcoming biography. Sloan prefers her
music without sugar, favoring artists like Travis, Björk
and Morrissey. How will she ever write an entire book
without her eyes permanently rolled to the back of her
head? To aide in her research, Sloan moves into the twins'
multi-million dollar symmetrical mansion appropriately
named "The Joint." As she starts her research, she hopes to
tactfully ask the twins her Tough Questions (Have they had
sex? How does that work? How will one get married and have
kids while the other one wants to travel around the world
and be the "cool aunt?"). Instead, she stumbles across much
larger questions, like what is their father's deep dark
secret, and just why exactly did their mother abandon them
hours after their birth?
My initial reaction to this plot was complete skepticism --
why would anyone want to read about conjoined twins with
preposterous names like Flora and Fauna who also just
happen to be a popular singing sensation in the vein of
Britney and Christina? The freak show factor actually
helped draw me into the story, much like a reality
television show. LOVE WILL TEAR US APART is spellbinding
with its fourth-wall awareness of how ridiculous the L.A.
lifestyle and the music industry can be.
Two's Company
When 35-year-old celebrity journalist Sloan Madden is asked
to write a biography of Grammy-winning pop princesses Flora
and Fauna Sparks -- sexy seventeen-year-old Siamese twins
who are joined at the hip -- she thinks it'll be an easy,
lucrative gig. But as soon as she takes the job, Sloan
discovers that the Sparks sisters' empire hides deep
cracks. She's barely signed her book contract before Fauna
confesses her secret dream: she wants to record a solo
album.
Three's a Crowd
Moving into a guest suite at the Joint -- the symmetrical
Beverly Hills home the twins share with their Bud-sucking
father, Fred -- perpetually single Sloan can't help but
start to view her own life differently. Suddenly everything
from the affair she's having with debonair screenwriter
Brian Understahl, to her unrequited love for her best
friend, Travis, to herodd, burgeoning desire for the twins'
troubled father leaves her wondering whether couplehood
isn't overrated -- whether there isn't something more to
life. But redemption comes at a price. And with Flora and
Fauna pulling her into their downward spiral of catfights,
career sabotage, drug abuse, sex, and jealousy, Sloan
stands to lose as much as she has to gain.
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