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The Food andFornication Fables
The Writer's Coffee Shop
December 2013
On Sale: December 5, 2013
Featuring: Lance Packhard; Millicent Deafly
310 pages
ISBN: 1612131921
EAN: 9781612131924
Kindle: B00H3YV4VK
e-Book
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Erotic | Romance
Gorgeous, narcissistic, self-absorbed Lance Packhard is a
sex therapist specializing in Awakenings, helping anorgasmic
women find sexual fulfillment. Lance’s spare time is dedicated to the cult of his body and
writing a how-not-to book entitled Sexual Secrets of a
Sexual Surrogate. His personal life consists of Sunday tea
with his grandmother and a monthly night out with his best
friend, George. Oh, and no sex, none whatsoever. When a wealthy, ruthless mother offers him an enormous sum
to seduce and impregnate her thirty-six-year-old daughter,
Millicent Deafly, a debt-ridden Lance hesitantly agrees.
However, Millicent is not into sex, and definitely not into
Lance. She’s chosen the other end of the sensuality spectrum
and is heavily into food. She is bright, bouncy and joyous,
uninhibitedly plump, natural, and completely dedicated to
her palate. The only way Lance will get her attention is if
he dabs soy sauce on his pulse points. Determined to get close to her, Lance creates an alter
ego—sweetly shy Wilfred Pecklise—and takes a job at
Millicent’s dinner club, Guilty Pleasures. Guilty Pleasures caters to the flamboyant and the eccentric:
supermodels pigging out, trash-metal rock stars with
penis-piercings and their loving grannies, the widows of
billionaires, and many more oddities. Lance finds himself immersed in a sensuous world of scents,
tastes, and color, and befriended by Serge Moreno—a
homosexual black dwarf who has had a colorful life as a
prostitute in Istanbul, a fluffer in skin flicks in Vegas,
and is now a celebrity chef in London. Ironically, Lance isn’t just failing to seduce Millie, but
falling madly in love with her.
Balancing the two lives of Lance and Wilfred becomes next to
impossible when his geeky best friend, George, suddenly
marries and decides to hold the reception at Guilty
Pleasures. Will the truth be uncovered?
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