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The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me
Lisa Ann Walter
HarperOne
May 2011
On Sale: May 17, 2011
256 pages
ISBN: 0062025740
EAN: 9780062025746
Hardcover
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Non-Fiction Memoir
Follow one woman's bumpy, cellulite-riddled ride through
size-0 Hollywood and learn how she went from body-dysmorphic
to sassy-asstastic in only twenty-five short years of
dieting, thousands of dollars in "procedures,". . . and one
pair of industrial-strength Spanx. From the best girlfriend you didn't know you had comes this
"I Can't Believe She Said That" guide to life in the real
world. Actress and comic Lisa Ann Walter dishes about
parenthood and the dangers of girl-on-girl snarking,
explains why skinny actresses act crazy, and gives riotous
advice on everything from the dating mistakes we all make to
ten things you should subtract when you weigh yourself
(self-tanner and dental work, for starters . . .). So what do you get when you drop a longtime self-loather
into the glitz and glamour of Hollywood? This hysterical,
and brutally honest, look at the impossible standard of
perfection for which so many of us strive. Walter boldly
shares her lifelong struggle with low self-esteem—which, in
her case, includes plenty of painful auditions, failed
relationships, and awkward celebrity encounters, plus lots
of impossible diets, questionable injectables, and dubious
cosmetic procedures. Along the way, the "celebrity adjacent"
Walter also tells her sometimes warm, often cringeworthy,
and always funny Hollywood stories (including the reason
she'd kill for Richard Gere). She also shares her sage advice by offering features such as
ways to improve your self-esteem that won't cost you a dime: Four words: Push-up. Bra. Construction. Site. You don't even have to
look good to get a response. Just wear sunglasses, square
your shoulders, and toss your hair. Then count the whistles. Start frequenting your local gay bar. Both gays and lesbians
are much more effusive about how fabulous you are! And
you'll get free drinks! Always be seen with decrepit old men—you'll look young and
beautiful in comparison. Think how well this works for those
Girls Next Door.
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