THE DECISION is book one in the Prairie State
Friends
series.
Elaine Schrock has been raised by her grandparents since
she
was five
years old and her parents died in a buggy accident. Now
they
are burying her
grandfather who just passed away from a heart attack.
Elaine
found him in
the barn, but before he died, he made Elaine promise to
always
be there and
care for her grandmother. It is a promise she intends to
keep.
THE
DECISION is Elaine's story of taking care of her
grandmother
who
becomes ill with two serious diseases. Elaine tries so
hard to
help her
grandmother but she wonders if she will be enough to help
her
grieve and
heal from losing her husband.
At this time, Elaine is being courted by Jonah. Jonah is a
character author
Wanda Brunstetter fans will recognize from the Brides
of
Lancaster County series. Jonah
Miller moved to a new Amish community in Illinois from
Pennsylvania the
previous year after a breakup on his wedding day. He has
his
sister close
by, but he wishes his parents would move closer to them.
As
things are
going well between Elaine and Jonah, Elaine discovers the
news
of her grandmother's health. She makes a decision that
will
affect not only
her life but Jonah's as well. Will Jonah be able to change
her
mind, and what will happen to these two if he can't?
Elaine
cannot leave
her grandmother. She pushes him away and, unsurprisingly,
a
lovely
young widow is waiting in the wings ready to get her own
second
chance at
love.
My heart broke for Elaine the whole time while reading her
story. First
she loses her grandfather, then her grandmother gets sick.
Then she tells
Jonah she isn't ready to leave her grandmother. I read
Elaine's
story in
just one sitting as I was totally emotionally invested in
her
life and what she
was going through. I won't spoil anything about THE
DECISION
with
those reading my review, but I will say the ending was a
total
surprise for
me. Once I finished, I just sat there thinking about what
I
would have done
in Elaine's situation. I had to tell a bunch of my reading
friends about the story
and how I was feeling because my emotions were going
crazy! I
wish I could have
given Elaine a hug and helped her through the difficult
things
she had to
do.
Discover along with Jonah Miller how life can begin anew in
the prairie state of Illinois. Moving from Pennsylvania,
finding rewarding work, and leaving heartbreak behind is the
best decision Jonah ever made. But is he ready to consider
love again when he meets Elaine Schrock? Will his scarred
heart mend when she chooses family loyalty over love?
Excerpt
Arthur, Illinois
Edna Schrock shivered and pulled her woolen shawl tightly
around her shoulders as she stepped out of the house
Saturday evening. Th e air was cold and windy, like it had
been most of the winter, yet it was two weeks into spring.
Th ey ought to be having warmer weather by now, but winter
didn’t seem to want to give in just yet. Last week, the
temperatures rose into the upper seventies, and everyone
caught spring fever. Neighbors and friends began preparing
their gardens, and fi elds had already been plowed and were
ready to be planted. Green shoots from fl owers were coming
up, and buds on the maples had turned red. Unfortunately,
this time of year it wasn’t unusual for the weather to tease
people into thinking winter was fi nally gone. Th e calendar
might say it was April, but Mother Nature said otherwise.
Heading toward the barn, where her grandfather had gone to
check on the horses, Elaine hurried her footsteps. Th e wind
howled noisily. She glanced toward the darkening sky and
shivered. It almost felt like it could snow.
Elaine entered the barn and headed for the horses’ stalls.
“Grandpa,” she called, seeing no sign of him in the fi rst
stall where Grandma’s horse, Misty, had bedded down for the
night.
She stopped to listen, but there was no response.
Moving on to the stall where her own horse, Daisy, was kept,
Elaine still saw no sign of Grandpa. When she reached across
the gate to stroke the mare’s head, she heard a low moan
coming from the next stall.
Hurrying over, Elaine gasped. Grandpa lay in the straw a few
feet from his horse, Dusty. “Grandpa, what happened? Did you
slip and fall?” she asked, opening the gate and quickly
entering the stall.
Grandpa’s eyelids fluttered, and he clutched his chest.
“Lainie,” he murmured, using the nickname he’d given her
when she was a girl.
“I’m here, Grandpa,” she said, dropping to her knees beside him.
“Please, tell me what’s wrong.” “I—I am katzodemich,”
he mumbled.
“You’re short of breath?” Elaine’s heart pounded when he
gave a feeble nod. Although she tried to remain calm, she
couldn’t help noticing Grandpa’s pale skin and the bluish
tint to his fingers and lips.
“Lie still, Grandpa,” she murmured. “I’ll run out to the
phone shanty and call for help.”
“No, wait,” he said, clasping her hand. “There’s something I
need to ask you.”
“What is it?” Elaine leaned closer to him, barely able to
make out his words.
“If I don’t make it—will you promise me something?”
Grandpa’s voice seemed to be growing weaker.
“Of course, Grandpa. What is it?”
“Look after your grandma for me. She—she’ll need someone to
care for her now. C–can you promise me that?”
Tears welled in Elaine’s eyes as she held his cold hand. “I
promise that I’ll always be there for Grandma, no matter
what.” She gave his fingers a reassuring squeeze. “Help will
be here soon, Grandpa. Don’t worry, you’re going to be fine.”
Elaine rose to her feet and dashed out of the barn. It had
begun to rain hard, and the bleakness of her mood matched
that of the foreboding sky. Tension mounted in her chest as
she raced on shaky legs toward the phone shanty. The cold,
wet drops made it hard to hurry as she slipped along, trying
not to lose her footing. “Dear Lord,” she prayed out loud,
“please let my grandpa be okay. Grandma needs him, and so do I.”
Chapter 1
Tears coursed down Elaine’s cheeks and dripped
onto the front of her black mourning dress. Th e mourners
had arrived at the cemetery a few minutes ago, ready to put
Grandpa Schrock’s body to rest in the ground. He’d died of
an apparent heart attack just moments after the paramedics
arrived Saturday evening. Th is morning, because Grandma
wanted it that way, Grandpa’s funeral service had been held
in a large tent outside their home, rather than in the Otto
Center, where some local Amish funerals took place.
During the service, one of the ministers quoted Matthew 5:7:
“Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.”
Grandpa had always been merciful to others, and so had
Grandma. When Elaine was fi ve years old and her parents had
been killed in a buggy accident, her father’s parents had
taken her in. Th ey’d been wonderful substitute parents,
teaching, loving, and nurturing Elaine, yet asking so little
in return. She only hoped she could live a life that would
be pleasing not only to Grandma, but also to God.
If I’d only found Grandpa sooner, could he have been
saved? Elaine
wondered. Oh, Grandpa, I already miss you so much.
Elaine glanced over at her grandmother, standing to her left
with hands folded, as though praying. Her eyes brimmed with
tears. Grandma Schrock was a strong woman, but the grief she
felt over losing her husband of forty-fi ve years was
evident on her face. And why wouldn’t it be? Elaine’s
grandparents always had a deep, abiding love for each other,
and it showed in everything they said and did as a couple.
Elaine hoped to experience that kind of love when she got
married someday.
Taking Grandma’s hand, Elaine’s throat constricted as
Grandpa’s simply crafted wooden coffin was placed inside a
rough pine box that had already been set in the opening of
the grave. Death for the earthly body was final, yet she was
confident that Grandpa’s soul lived on and that he now
resided in a much better place. Grandpa had lived the
Christian life in every sense of the word, and he’d told
Elaine many times that he loved the Lord with all his heart,
soul, and mind. Yes, Elaine felt certain that Grandpa was in
heaven with Jesus right now and perhaps even looking down on
them with a smile. Did Grandma feel it, too? Quite possibly
she did, for she gave Elaine’s fingers a gentle squeeze as
she turned her face toward the blue sky. Thank You, Lord,
for giving us a sunny day to say our good-byes, Elaine
prayed.
A slight chill hung in the air, but at least it wasn’t
raining, and only a gentle breeze whispered among the many
headstones surrounding them. A bird chirped from a tree
outside the fenced-in graveyard, as though offering comfort
and a hope for the future.
A group of men from their church district began to sing
while the grave was filled in by the pallbearers. Elaine
winced. Although she had been quite young when her parents
died, she still remembered standing in the cemetery during
the burial, holding her grandparents’ hands. Elaine’s
maternal grandparents, who had since died, had been living
in Oklahoma back then. They had decided not to uproot Elaine
from the only home she’d known, and she was grateful that
Grandma and Grandpa Schrock had been more than willing to
take her in. As the last shovelful of dirt was placed over
the coffin, Elaine remembered her final words with Grandpa
and her promise to take care of Grandma. And I will,
Elaine reminded herself. For as long as Grandma needs me,
I will be there for her.
Bishop Levi Kauffman asked the congregation to pray the
Lord’s Prayer silently, which concluded the graveside
service. It was time to start back to the house for the
funeral meal their friends and neighbors had prepared, but
Elaine had no appetite. She’d be going through the motions
and doing what was expected of her. Grandma would no doubt
do the same.
Scanning the faces of close friends and church members,
Elaine saw that the heartache she and Grandma felt today was
shared by all.
Although nothing had been said during the funeral service
earlier this morning about Grandpa’s attributes, everyone
knew that Lloyd Schrock was a kind, caring man. Having
farmed in this community from the time he’d married Grandma
until his recent retirement, Grandpa had proved his strong
work ethic and commitment to the community. How many times
had Elaine witnessed him getting up at the crack of dawn to
head out to the fields without a word of complaint? Grandma
always got up with him and made sure he ate a hearty
breakfast before beginning another busy day. She’d done the
same for Elaine throughout her school days.
Elaine would miss their shared meals, as well as Grandpa’s
smile and the stories he often told. On cold winter
evenings, they would sit by the fire, enjoying apple cider
and some of Grandma’s delicious pumpkin or apple pie. All
the wonderful times the three of them had together would be
cherished memories.
As folks turned from the grave site and began walking back
to their buggies, Elaine’s friends Priscilla Herschberger
and Leah Mast approached Elaine and her grandmother and
hugged them warmly. No words were necessary. These two young
women had been Elaine’s best friends since they were
children, and even though at twenty-two Elaine was the
youngest of the three, they’d always gotten along well.
“Are you coming over to our house for the meal?” Elaine asked.
Priscilla and Leah both nodded.
“We’ll do whatever we can to help out today so you and your
grandma can relax and visit with those who attend.” Leah,
whose hair was golden brown like a chestnut, gave Elaine’s
arm a tender squeeze.
“You can count on us, not just for today, but in the days
ahead as you and your grandma strive to adjust.” Priscilla’s
dark eyes, matching the color of her hair, revealed the
depth of her love.
“Danki, I appreciate you both so much.” Given a
choice, Elaine would prefer to keep busy, but she’d be
expected to visit with the guests, so she wouldn’t think of
turning down her friends’ offer of help.
“I am grateful for you, too,” Grandma said, her voice
trembling a bit.
“I value all of our friends in this community.”
As Elaine and Grandma moved slowly toward their buggy,
Elaine caught sight of Jonah Miller heading her way. For
nearly a year, she and Jonah had been courting, and Elaine
was fairly certain it was just a matter of time before he
proposed marriage. A week ago, she would have eagerly agreed
to marry Jonah if he’d asked. But with Grandpa dying, she
needed to be there for Grandma. Perhaps later, once Grandma
had recovered sufficiently, Elaine would be ready for
marriage. But she would continue to look after Grandma,
making sure that all of her needs were met.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” Jonah said, his coffee-colored
eyes showing the depth of his concern as he looked first at
Grandma and then Elaine. “If there’s anything I can do for
either of you, please let me know,” he added, pulling his
fingers through the back of his thick, curly black hair,
sticking out from under the brim of his black dress hat.
“We will,” Grandma murmured. “Danki.”
All Elaine could manage was a brief nod. If she spoke to
Jonah, her tears would flow, and she might not be able to
stop them. There would be time for her and Jonah to
talk—perhaps later this afternoon or evening if he stayed
around after the meal that long. Jonah had a business to
run, and he might need to get back to work this afternoon.
As though reading her thoughts, Jonah touched Elaine’s arm
and said, “I’ll see you back at your house.” Nodding in
Grandma’s direction, he sprinted for his horse and buggy.
As Jonah stepped into his buggy and picked up the reins, he
thought about Elaine and her grandmother and wondered what
they would do now that Lloyd was gone. Would they continue
to offer sit-down dinners in their home for curious
tourists, or would Elaine find some other employment in
order to help out financially? Although Lloyd had retired
from farming, he’d continued to earn money by selling a good
deal of the produce they raised to a local store where many
Amish, as well as some English, shopped. He wondered if
Elaine would end up taking over that responsibility.
I could ask Elaine to marry me now. That would solve any
financial worries she and her grandma might have. Jonah
smiled. It would also make me a happy man.
Jonah had been unlucky in love—at least when he’d lived in
Pennsylvania. He had fallen in love with Meredith, a
beautiful young woman whom he’d met several years before
while visiting Florida. Meredith had believed that her
husband was killed in a tragic bus accident, and after a
suitable time of courting, Jonah and Meredith made plans to
be married. But on the eve of their wedding, Meredith’s
husband, Luke, showed up. It turned out that he hadn’t been
on that bus after all, but had suffered from amnesia because
of a beating he’d received at the Philadelphia bus station.
For over a year, Meredith had grieved for Luke, until she’d
finally given her heart to Jonah. When Luke showed up,
claiming his wife and child, Jonah’s whole world had turned
upside down. Knowing he needed to get away from Lancaster
County and begin again, a year and a half ago Jonah had
moved to Arthur, Illinois, where his twin sister, Jean,
lived with her family. Jean had also suffered a great loss
when her first husband, Silas, was killed in a tragic
accident. But since then, she had remarried. Jean had two
children, Rebecca and Stephen by her first husband, and now
she and Nathan had a baby boy named Ezekiel.
Jonah’s bishop from childhood used to say, “Everything
happens for a reason. God can take the tragedies in our
lives and use them for something good.” That was true in his
sister’s life, for she seemed happy and content. Jonah had
also found happiness and love again when he’d met Elaine. He
looked forward to the future and hoped to make the pretty
blond his wife someday. But while she and her grandma were
recovering from this great loss, he wouldn’t bring up the
subject of marriage. Instead, he’d be there for her,
offering support in every way. When the time was right, he’d
propose.
Thinking about the others who had been at the cemetery,
Jonah reflected on how Sara Stutzman had looked as though
she might break down at any moment. Sara’s husband, Harley,
had been killed by a falling tree ten months ago. Attending
Lloyd’s funeral and going to the graveside service must have
been difficult for her, especially given that Harley’s grave
wasn’t more than ten feet from where Lloyd was buried.
It was hard for Jonah, too, because he and Harley had been
good friends. Since Jonah was courting Elaine, he had to be
careful not to offer Sara too much support. But he, as well
as several other men from their community, had gone over to
Sara’s several times to help out with chores. Jonah still
dropped by occasionally to check on Sara and her two-yearold
son, Mark. Usually Jonah’s sister, Jean, was with him, as
she and Sara were good friends. He wondered if Sara would
get married again, since it would be better for Mark if he
had a father.
But that’s really none of my business, Jonah told
himself. If it’s meant for Sara to marry again, she’ll
choose the right man when the time comes.
Back at the house, Elaine visited a bit and then headed for
her bedroom to retrieve a gift she’d purchased the week
before for Leah. As she walked down the hall, each step was
a struggle. Walking into her room on the main floor, Elaine
quietly closed the door. The voices from those who had
gathered in the yard, as well as from inside the house,
became muffled.
She stood by the bedroom window, her head leaning against
the cool glass. Gazing outside at the people who were
visiting in the yard, she was overwhelmed by how many
friends Grandpa had made over the years. Elaine watched with
blurry vision as Priscilla and Leah and a few other women
dashed around, making sure food and drinks were readily
available for everyone. It was nice to see Grandma receiving
so much support on such a difficult day. For Elaine, it was
like losing her father all over again, only worse because
she’d been with Grandpa a lot longer. Grandma’s heart was
aching, too. It would take some time to work through all of
this, and they would need to rely on God.
Away from well-meaning people, the tears Elaine had held in
for most of the morning pushed quickly to the surface.
Quietly, she let them fall, covering her mouth to stifle the
cries. Grandpa was gone, yet it seemed as though he were
still here. His presence would be felt in this house for a
long time. Grandpa’s voice seemed to whisper in Elaine’s
ear: “Make each day count, Lainie, no matter what. Things
happen for a reason, and although we may not understand it,
in time, you’ll find the answers you seek.” Grandma used
to remind Elaine of similar things, often saying, “The
Lord knows what is best for each of His children.”
God, is all of this really what’s best for me?
Elaine’s jaw clenched. First, You took my parents, and
now You’ve taken Grandpa, whom we need so much. I feel like
I’m in a dark tunnel without any light to guide me out.
She could stand in her bedroom and sob all day, but she had
to get ahold of herself. It was time for her to support
Grandma, just as she and Grandpa had always been there for her.
Elaine wiped away the tears with her apron and went to her
closet to get Leah’s gift, a bag of daffodil bulbs from the
market. Leah’s favorite color was yellow, and Elaine thought
her friend would enjoy planting them and seeing them bloom
every spring. She had enough bulbs to give half to
Priscilla. She hadn’t planned it this way, but it would be
her way of saying thank you for all they were doing to make
things easier on her and Grandma. She would ask them to
plant the flowers in memory of Grandpa.
Elaine hesitated, wishing she could stay in her room a
little longer. She took a deep breath, squeezing her eyes
tightly shut. Grandma must want to be alone in her grief,
too, and yet throughout the funeral, graveside service, and
now here for the meal, she had put on a brave face in the
presence of others.
How can one go on after losing their soul mate and
partner for life? Elaine
wondered. How does a wife begin each new day, knowing her
husband is gone and won’t be coming back? First Grandma
had lost her only son, and now her husband was gone. Oh,
Lord, Elaine prayed, help me to be there for her in
every way, offering all of the comfort and care she will
need in order to get through each day.
Elaine thought of Jonah and wondered what it would be like
if she’d never met him. She cared deeply for Jonah and hoped
to have a future with him, but how fair would it be for him
to have to help her care for Grandma? The most difficult
part of today was behind her, but now the real work would
begin. It was time to pick up the pieces of their lives and
try to move on.
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