As the title implies, ZEN MASTER TOVA TARANTINO TOSHIBA:
The Illustrious and Delusional Abbess of Satire is a
scathing satire on religion and philosophy. Alternatively
known as a man or woman, or other, Master Tova is in
turns Imam, Rabbi, Reverend, depending on the source. ZEN
MASTER TOVA TARANTINO TOSHIBA's teachings are presented
as a collection of quotes and short stories, from a few
words to a few pages. The sayings were supposedly
collected over the years, all around the world, from
presumed descendants, students and disciples. And
predictably, there are many offspring of the famous
Master who bear famous people's last names. As it
happens, whichever school of thought or religion you
might think of, errata were made as to the founder:
everything obviously begins and ends with Master Tova.
Master Tova comes off as rather clueless, she shows
little empathy, she doesn't listen to anyone. She cares
only about one thing: herself, and she definitely doesn't
practice what she preaches. After all, she is the One who
knows, the One who preaches, the One to listen to. Some
advice could endanger other's health or life, but surely
that's their own problem. And so she will meditate, which
surprisingly is very much akin to sleeping, but for
Master Tova, it is a profound state of some sort of
awareness or other.
I liked that the tone of the various stories differs
according to the time, place and source from which it
purportedly originates; at times sounding like a Jewish
mother, a Chinese philosopher or a Valley Girl, Master
Tova never fails to astonish. At the back of the book, we
find praise for the book from very famous people whose
names seem to bear uncanny misspellings... But that's not
the point, is it?
There is one thing I found interesting and quite
unsettling about ZEN MASTER TOVA TARANTINO TOSHIBA: The
Illustrious and Delusional Abbess of Satire is a scathing
satire on religion and philosophy. It demonstrates how
easily the words of great thinkers, be it Heidegger,
Augustine or Derrida, can be misconstrued or
misapprehended: a misunderstood term, a few omitted or
misplaced words, and profound thinking becomes asinine,
illogical and completely irrational. And it makes for a
very amusing little book that turns profound thinking on
its head.
This fictional short-story collection challenges
perceptions and illusions about religious masters,
spiritual teachers, gurus, charlatans and holy men and
women of all persuasions, while simultaneously tickling
our funny bone and exercising the muscles our faces rely
on for laughter. Zen Master Tova Tarantino Toshiba takes
liberty with questionable material from the living sea,
near Egypt; tofu paper, in Okinawa; a tomb, in Italy; a
shaman, in Ethiopia; and a half-sister, in India. The
words, quotes, koans and stories, of this soon to be
classical work, include the timeless insights of Let the
Worm’s Go, Dead Food, Reality Bites, Stealing the Buddha,
Drip After Drip, Sound of One Eye, Catching Wind, Looking
Good, My Cat’s Enlightened, Chocolate Box, and Sex, Drugs
and Sushi Rolls.
"Enlightenment or laughs? With Gabriel Constans’ book you
don’t have to choose. Zen masters usually have a sense of
humor, or need one. Gabriel’s got it, and he gives us a
world of illusions to laugh about." Bob Fenster, author of
Duh: The Stupid History of the Human Race
Thank you for your brilliant and insightful review Monique. Are you sure you aren't a relative of Zen Master Tova Tarantino Toshiba? (Gabriel Constans 12:44pm September 26, 2014)