There are mice.
Lots of mice. Running all over my room. Letting out crying
sounds that grate on my ears. They crawl on my feet. My
legs. I feel them on my arms. Soft things with toenails like
blunt needles.
βMomma?β I say. Sheβs dressed in a long nightgown. Her
fingernails are sharp like the tops of just-opened cans. βWe
gotta get rid of the mice. We gotta call an exterminator.β I
hand her an old-fashioned phone.
βYouβre right, Lacey,β Momma says. But instead, she cuts at
her face with her nails. Deep wounds open up, split wide,
and blood, dark blood like ink, makes paths down her face to
the floor. She cries.
βStop that,β I say. βStop it now.β
But Momma doesnβt listen. Just cuts and cries.
*Β Β Β *Β Β Β *
I AWOKE with a start, my heart thudding in my neck. My whole
body felt like Iβd been dunked in an ice bath.
βOnly a dream,β I said to myself, then glanced at the clock:
3:46 A.M. I started to close my eyes. The wind nudged at the
house. I could smell the magnolia tree.
Something moved in the corner.
βHello?β I said, clutching my sheet to my chest. βSomeone here?β
There was no answer.
The floor creaked near the closet.
βHello?β I wanted to sit up in bed, but I couldnβt quite move.
βGranddaddy?β My voice came out small. It felt like all the
hair on my head was trying to get away from me.
βLacey?β
Fear flashed a white streak behind my eyes. I gave a jump.
βGranddaddy?β
βLacey?β
Momma! It was Momma! Crying out a second time from her room.
Her voice sad and scared and weepy. So the crying part of my
dream was real. And maybe there was a mouse near the closet.
A mouse coming from my dreams, alive and real? That was
ridiculous. Of course that couldnβt be.
βAre you okay?β I called to Momma. I kept my eyes toward the
closet. Straining to see. Just darkness. No movement now.
The night breeze pushed into my room. The smell of the
ocean. So peaceful. No more sounds from the closet. Good.
Good. I took in a breath to push my fear away.
βGranddaddy,β I said, hoping he wasnβt close enough to hear
me, βthis isΒ
myΒ room.β A girl should at
least have privacy in her bedroom. My heartbeat slowed.
βLacey? I need you.β
βComing.β
Man, was I tired. My eyes burned. But I threw my feet over
the side of the bed. As soon as I touched the cool wood of
the floor, fear surged in behind me. Run! I hurried toward
my motherβs room. It was like something chased me down the
hall though I knewΒ β¦Β
Did I?β¦ nothing was there.
A few more stepsΒ
Go, go!Β and I made it.
βWhat is it, Momma?β I leaned against the doorjamb. Her
nightlight showed the pattern of flowers on the carpet.
βIβm scared.β Her voice was shaky. Did she have a nightmare,
too? βGranddaddy keeps bothering me. Has he been coming into
your room? Iβve told him not to. To let you sleep because of
tomorrow.β Mommaβs voice wasnβt even as loud as a whisper. I
had to walk to the side of her bed to hear. I could see her
slender form under the blankets. βAnd I told
himΒ
IΒ have to sleep too, because of
you-know-what.β
I nodded but Momma didnβt look my way. Just gripped the
sheet and blanket in her fingers and spoke like maybe I was
glued to the ceiling.
βBut he wonβt let me alone,β Momma said. She glanced in my
direction, then back again. βIf you get in bed with me,
Lacey, I think heβll stay outta here for a while.β
HadΒ he been to my room? For a moment I felt
something behind me. Like someone watched. The feeling was
muddy, heavy. Almost on my shoulder. Almost pushing me
toward Momma. I refused to look back. Not that I could have
seen much of anything. The darkness was fat, almost
difficult, in the hall.
βWill you sleep here?β
βAll right, Momma.β Forcing myself not to
hurry,Β
Quick, move it!, I took my time.
Granddaddy might be the boss of this house, but I wasnβt
going to let him know he scared me, too. I climbed in next
to my mother and snuggled close. βTurn on your side and Iβll
scrooch up to your back.β
βOkay, Lacey. Okay.β
Momma was so thin I could feel her ribs. Could have counted
them. I could smell her sweat, too. βYou go on to sleep,β I
said. βIf Granddaddy comes back in, Iβll send him out.β
Donβt let him come in here.Β And
then,Β
You know he wonβt.Β And
another,Β
He could.
βThank you, baby,β Momma said. βYou watch for him awhile.
But wake me if he tries anything.β
I yawned big. βI will.β Here I was, all of fourteen years
old, and I was crawling into bed with my momma.
You big scaredy cat,Β I thought
. Donβt let him
come in here. You know he wonβt. He canβt. Not possible.
With Momma so near, my fears faded some. My heart slowed.
And at last I was asleep.