Sasha awoke, blinking up into
the light thrown down by an unshielded fluorescent tube.
Something’s
different, she thought. But a quick look around her
said it wasn’t
the scenery."
She was still in hell. It wasn’t
the Christians’ fire-and-brimstone hell or her father’s
nine-layered
Mayan underworld of rivers and roads and monsters, though.
No, this
hell was one of cool, blank walls and a narrow cot in a ten-
by-ten cell
with gray walls, floor, and ceiling. This hell was being
the prisoner
of an enormous, green-eyed, chestnut-haired man who called
himself Iago,
but whom the others called "Master.""
Where is the library?
his red-robed, forearm-tattooed interrogators asked her
over and over
again while drug-spiced smoke oozed from stone braziers
carved into
the shapes of screaming skulls. Each time, her muscles
screamed protest
at the crucified position they’d tied her in, roping her to
a wooden
cross that represented not the son of the Christians’ god,
but the
world tree of the Maya and Aztec, with its roots delving
into hell,
its branches reaching to the sky. Where did your father
hide it?
Sometimes they lashed her with stone-tipped flails that
drew bloody,
purple-black lines on her body. Other times they didn’t hit
her at
all, but rather somehow put her in agony without touching
her, watching
with avid eyes as she writhed and screamed."
She would’ve given anything
to make the torture stop, but she couldn’t tell them what
she didn’t
know. She’d kept insisting that Ambrose had never told her
anything
about a library. They didn’t believe her, though, which
meant that
the cycle kept repeating over and over again—days of
impotent, drugged
fugue interspersed with pain and terror. She thought they
might have
moved her once or twice, but the details had blurred
together, growing
ever more distant as her mind insulated her consciousness
from the reality
her body was suffering. Each time the interrogators had
opened the cell
door, reality had receded further, her burgeoning fantasies
coming clearer."
She knew the waking dreams
were nothing more than illusions, constructs that her mind
created for
her as an escape. But she clung fiercely to the fantasies
in her drugged
stupor, because if her consciousness was wrapped in the
dreams, she
wasn’t aware of what was happening in the interrogation
chamber. And
that was a blessed relief."
Sometimes the fantasies brought
her to a strange cave, a circular stone room that should
have reminded
her of the interrogation room and the horrors within it.
But she wasn’t
terrified in this chamber, wasn’t hurt. Instead, she was
wildly aroused,
wrapped around a big, powerful man with long, wavy dark
hair and green
eyes that reminded her of the pine forests up in Maine. In
the dreams,
she breathed him in, lost herself in his kiss, and felt,
maybe for the
first time in her life, like she was exactly where she
belonged. Which
was how she knew it was a fantasy, because Sasha had done
many things
in her life, but she’d never truly fit anywhere."
Other times the dreams brought
her back to Boston, to the pretty, sun-filled studio
apartment where
she’d lived across the hall from a firefighter’s widow, an
elderly
ex–concert violinist named Ada, who’d become her friend.
Sasha had
cooked for her neighbor a few nights a week, gladly trading
pumpkinseed
dip and spicy barbecued shrimp for snippets of Bach and
Mozart, and
the knowledge that someone cared whether or not she made it
home at
night. Only she hadn’t made it home, had she? Instead she’d
gone
looking for Ambrose and wound up in hell, stuck there as
her menstrual
clock told her months passed, almost a year, while she lay
dazed by
drugs and hopelessness."
Except she wasn’t drugged
or hopeless now. She felt sharp and energized for the first
time in
what seemed like forever."
Hardly daring to trust the
sudden change, she sat up on her bunk and braced herself
for the pain
to hit. It didn’t. Instead, nerves and excitement and all
sorts of
other sharp, hot emotions poked through the numb confusion
that had
cloaked her for too long."
"What the hell is going on?"
she asked, and jerked at the sound of her own voice, the
alien clarity
of words that weren’t drugged mumbles or throat-tearing
screams."
Starting to shake now—with
hope, with fear—she took stock. She was wearing the sturdy
bush pants
she’d had on when she’d been captured, along with a too-big
navy
sweatshirt she’d had for a while now, though she didn’t
know who
she’d gotten it from, or when. Her underwear, T-shirt, and
socks were
long gone to rags, her boots confiscated. All that was the
same as it
had been. The cuts on her palms, though, were new."
She stared at the shallow,
scabbed-over slices as a hazy memory broke through. Had she
dreamed
of a brown-haired man bending over her with a serrated
combat knife,
his eyes flickering from hazel to luminous green and back
again? If
so, it was a new, less pleasant fantasy than the others,
her imagination
run amok. But no, she was positive he had been there; she
had the scabs
to prove it. Had he done something to neutralize the
tranquilizers they’d
been mixing in her food for so long? Or had the red-robes
withdrawn
the drugs for some reason, wanting her fully aware for
whatever they
had planned next? "
But she wasn’t just awake;
she felt damned good. Energy coursed through her,
effervescent bubbles
running in her veins, making her want to leap up and run,
to scream
with the mad exuberance of being alive. More, she was warm.
Hot, even,
and suddenly needy in a way she hadn’t been in a long, long
time.
Her heart pounded; her skin tingled. She thought of her
dark-haired,
green-eyed dream man, and ached for him, for the press of
his flesh
on hers. "
Lifting her hands, she cupped
her suddenly flushed cheeks, then let her fingertips drift
down to skim
across her collarbones and along her ribs. Surprise
shuddered through
her at the feel of smooth, toned flesh. Slowly, almost
afraid to look,
she lifted the hem of her sweatshirt so her eyes could
confirm what
her hands had found. Although it seemed impossible, the
festering sores
on her hips and shoulders had healed overnight, and the
crosshatched
welts, scabs and scars of the repeated whippings had faded
from her
skin. Her wasted flesh had been restored; her arms and legs
were muscled,
her butt and breasts rounded, as they had been before her
captivity."
Stunned, she let the sweatshirt
drop back down to cover her irrationally taut, toned
stomach. Her head
spun with disbelief, but not with drugs. "
If she’d believed in miracles,
she would’ve called it just that. How else could matching
slashes
on her palm cause her body to heal itself?"
"Doesn’t matter," she
told herself as the embers of the strong woman she’d once
been kindled
to a low, guttering flame of determination. "Don’t waste
whatever
time you’ve got trying to figure out what’s going on. Just
get your
ass out of here.""
Rising from the narrow, blanketless
cot, she stood for a moment, thrilling to the sense of
balance and power
that coursed through her, the awareness of her own body.
She acutely
felt the weight of her sweatshirt and pants, the press of
the floor
against the soles of her feet. In the back of her head
there was a splash
of fear that this was nothing more than another sort of
torture, that
Iago had given her back herself only to take the feeling
away again.
But on the heels of fear came determination. "If that’s
your plan,
you bastard, you’re going to regret it," she said
softly. "That’s
a promise."