Excerpt of Film At Eleven by Kelsey Roberts

Molly Jameson considered ways to kill herself.

Figuratively at least.

She wasn’t shy so much as intensely private, which made her current situation disconcerting.

She was vain enough to wonder for the umpteenth time if her clothing was right. Hopefully, the dark navy suit would convey professionalism to the audience. She’d pinned her long, blonde hair into a loose twist but several strands had fallen free. Her stomach flip-flopped yet again as she tried to smooth the hairs back into place.

“Five minutes, Dr. Jameson,” a masculine looking woman in jeans and a tee shirt said as she adjusted the microphone attached to her bulky headset.

Molly nodded and smiled. Outwardly, she hoped to appear cool and calm and tried not to think that she might be the very first person to vomit live on Montana’s most popular morning news show.

Her eyes darted around the chaotic television studio. He leaned against the desk in the center of the large room. He had an easy, engaging smile and seemed completely comfortable.

And why wouldn’t he? Chandler Landry was WMON- TV. His image was splashed on busses and billboards all over the place. Tilting her head, Molly studied him from the relative obscurity of her position behind one of three large cameras positioned around the set.

It wasn’t any secret that Chandler Landry was considered one of the most eligible bachelors in the greater Helena-Jasper area. He had it all – looks, breeding, money, class and confidence.

Molly gave him serious bonus points in the looks department. He was more than six feet of sculpted muscle and genetic perfection wrapped in a perfectly tailored, designer suit. His skin was deeply tanned but not leathery. His eyes were light brown, rimmed in dark, inky lashes. The only flaw – if she could call it that – was a slightly crooked smile. But it wasn’t really a flaw – nope, it was endearing and completely non-threatening. On any other man, it would have been a sneer. But on Chandler it added an innocent allure that gave him that air of boyish charm.

“We’re coming out of commercial,” headset woman said, motioning Molly toward the brightly lit set. “Follow me.”

Molly did, feeling all of her insecurities knot in the pit of her belly. Silently, she cursed Gavin Templesman. Only her beloved mentor could have conned her into doing this silly segment. Gavin knew how she felt about being in the public eye. He also knew how badly she wanted her book to succeed. She wanted to help people. That didn’t mean she wanted to sit under a circle of hot lights and have the intrusive camera trained on her face for the next half hour. She knew her stuff, saying something inappropriate or becoming tongue tied wasn’t going to be a problem for her. No matter how much she disliked the artifice of the television studio.

No, what she didn’t enjoy was the feeling of vulnerability and discomfort she felt as Chandler Landry strolled across the set toward her. She folded her hands loosely in her lap as she watched him approach, willing her erratic heart beat to slow and her breathing to remain even. Hard to imagine, but he was even better looking in person than on her twenty-seven inch screen at home.

She hoped he wasn’t a shaking hands kinda guy. Her palms were slightly damp. Which annoyed her no end.

“Dr. Jameson,” Chandler greeted with a smile that she felt all the way to her toes.

She subtly brushed her right hand on her skirt before taking the hand he offered and struggled to keep her knees from buckling. Up close, Chandler was a devastating sight to behold. The faint scent of his cologne was as intriguing as the fact that his palm was slightly calloused. Why would a pretty boy have callouses?

“Mr. Landry,” she greeted, forcing a lightness to her tone. “I feel like I know you already.”

“Most people do,” he replied easily. “The price you pay for being invited into the homes of viewers day in and day out.”

“We all have our crosses to bear,” she countered, dropping his hand.

“We’re back in fifteen,” a voice thundered through the studio.

Chandler held out a chair for her, presenting Molly with what she assumed was her first in a series of humiliations. In spite of her heels, she was forced to climb up on to the stool and her perfectly professional navy pumps fell about an inch shy of the foot bar.

“Ten seconds, Chandler.”

He rolled her into place. “Sit on the back of your jacket,” Chandler suggested. “It looks better on camera.”

“I thought I was here to give advice to your callers,” she said as she adjusted the bunched lapels of her suit.

He clipped a microphone to the creamy, silk tie that complimented his gunmetal gray shirt. “This is television, sweetheart. Ninety percent of it is how you look.”

“How positively shallow,” she muttered as she scooted the hem of her jacket beneath her hips. Sweetheart? What a condescending ass.

“People don’t tune in for ugly.”

“In five,” the body-less voice announced.

“Lucky for you.”

Chandler tossed her an easy smile. “Thanks, I think.”

“In four.”

Molly felt like a few thousand nerve endings wired for sound. While the studio was relatively quiet, everyone was watching the two of them. She felt like a zoo exhibit, and had to force herself not to fiddle with her hair and clothes. Something she rarely did. She was uncomfortably self-conscious and hoped to God it didn’t show. She took a deep calming breath and let it out slowly.

Better.

“Three.”

Her breathing was fine. It was her heart rate that was the problem. Nerves, anticipation, and damn it, the close proximity of Chandler Landry had her hyper aware. How did I allow myself to get talked into this?

“Two.”

Chandler patted her hand just as one of the large cameras wheeled closer to them. “Good luck, Doc.”

Headset woman brought her hand down and pointed at Chandler just as a large red light came on above the teleprompter attached to the camera lens.

“Good Morning again, Montana. I’m here in the studio this morning with author and psychiatrist Martha Jameson.”

Molly felt a trickle of perspiration dribble down between her shoulder blades. Part of it was the bright lights but most of it was palpable, intense fear.

“Dr. Jameson’s latest book,” Chandler continued, holding her book up as he spoke. “The Relationship Mambo, has just been released by University Press. Good Morning, Dr. Jameson.”

“Good morning,” she replied in a hideously scratched voice.

“I was reading your book last night and I was struck by the fact that you advocate casual physical encounters in this day and age.”

Leave it to a man to focus on the sex parts. Out of context, of course. This was going to be the longest fifteen minutes of her life. “Actually,” she began, treading the waters between being pissed and terrified. “You’ve misstated my position.” She ignored the dark flash in his eyes. “Sexuality is part of human nature. And while the ideal situation would be physical intimacy as part of a meaningful, committed relationship, that isn’t always practical. The chapter you referred to is a discussion of the double standard that exists in our society. I was simply stating my opinion that women should take ownership over their sexuality just as men have done since the dawn of time.”

“That’s great in theory, but doesn’t society frown on women being promiscuous?”

“I’m not advocating promiscuity, Mr. Landry. I’m acknowledging that women have the same physical needs as men.” And apparently the same homicidal tendencies, Molly thought, wanting to smack that smug smile off his handsome face. Strangely, her heart beat felt just fine and dandy now.

Great looking – yes. But smug, arrogant and very sure he was the be all and end all of any woman he met.

Nice try, Molly thought narrowing her eyes slightly, but no cigar. It would take a better man than you Gunga Din.

Chandler smiled and winked. “Let’s hope every woman out there adopts your philosophy. Dr. Jameson will answer any of your relationship questions. Call the number at the bottom of your screen.” Chandler flipped her book open to a pre-marked page. He glanced down, then looked at her under his brows as if surprised. “You also advocate divorce, Dr. Jameson.”

Molly’s blood boiled as she tried to maintain her fake smile. “Again, you’ve misinterpreted my position.” Read for comprehension, pretty boy! “I advocate divorce in situations where there is abuse, both physical and emotional.”

“Or lack of love,” he read.

“Which is a form of emotional abuse, Mr. Landry. Relationships are living things. They need fuel to survive. If there is no love, the relationship withers and dies.” Which is exactly what I’d like to happen to you!

“You don’t confine your advice to men and women,” he continued. “You write extensively about parent- child relationships as well. Do you have children, Dr. Jameson?”

“No. My book is based on research and almost a decade as a therapist.”

“Isn’t it hard for you to hold yourself out as an authority on children when you’ve never had any of your own?”

“Psychiatrists often can’t have firsthand knowledge of a given situation. For example, a doctor doesn’t have to beat his wife in order to understand the dynamic of spousal abuse.”

He gave her a slight nod of recognition. “We’ve got John on line one. Go ahead, John.”

“Yes,” a deep voice crackled through the studio. “My life sucks.”

“This is morning television, John,” Chandler warned politely. “Watch the language.”

“Anyway,” John’s voice sounded annoyed and tense. “I’ve got a crappy job. My mother’s always ragging me. The government screwed me.”

“Doctor?” Chandler interrupted. He gave Molly a ‘help me’ look.

“John, it sounds to me like you’re overwhelmed right now. I suggest you take some ‘me’ time.”

“I can’t. I need my lousy job to pay my bills. And my mother needs me. I do everything for her.”

Molly heard the anger and torment in the voice. “You have to make a choice, John. I hear your frustration. When we’re in that place, it affects everything we do. You have to take responsibility for your own happiness. If your job is making you miserable, then find another job. As for your mother, give yourself permission to take a break.”

“She needs me.”

“That may well be. But you need you, too. Once you’re happy and fulfilled, you’ll find that the other pieces of your life fall into place. Find something that will make you happy, John. One thing. Then do it.”

“We’ve got to take the next caller, John, good luck,” Chandler said, pressing one of the blinking lights on the phone in front of him. He greeted the caller by name as provided by his producer.

Chandler smiled over at the small woman with the authoritative tone. She was too damned cute to be such a tight ass. He’d actually found her book enlightening, insightful even. His producer had insisted he mention the section on sex. The plan had been to mention it once to please the higher-ups, and then move on. Then he saw Molly Jameson.

She was a prim, professional package at serious odds with the frank discussion on sexuality he’d read. This, of course, was far, far sexier. There was something incredibly appealing about this woman. He guessed she was much more than a pretty face hidden beneath a layer of navy linen.

Chandler had to struggle to look interested as the next few callers chimed in. Three women involved with losers who couldn’t or wouldn’t stop the cycle of the dead- end relationship. To her credit, Molly seemed to be taking it all in stride.

“. . . time for you to put a period on this relationship and move on,” Molly advised. “Don’t look at it as a failure, think of the two years you spent with Tony as a learning experience.”

“Thank you.”

Chandler listened as his producer’s voice boomed in his ear, then said, “Dr. Jameson, our first caller, John, is calling back.”

“Hello again, John,” she said.

Chandler watched as she wiped her damp palms across her lap. Odd that such a confident woman should be so uncomfortable on camera.

“I took your advice,” the caller stated.

“That’s good, John,” Molly replied, her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“Hey, John?” Chandler asked, “You only called ten minutes ago. How did you change your life in such a short period of time?”

“I did what she said,” John answered. “I just killed my mother.”