I never considered myself a “cruise” person. In my mind, a Caribbean cruise was
for newly-weds and nearly-deads. I pictured crowded buffets, jam-packed pool
decks, windowless cubicles masquerading as staterooms.
photo: Daily Express
Turns out I was looking at the wrong cruise lines.
Mystery and Romance Cruise, dreamed up by the dreamers at Vacations By
Design, is the one you want.
It’s an eleven-day indulgence you’ll never forget.
Okay, so some of you are objecting to the price. I don’t blame you. An
eleven-day cruise is going to cost you. But let’s face it—eleven days on ANY
vacation is going to cost you.
I’m good at math. Used to teach it, in fact. So let’s do the math. What does a
nice hotel room—a suite—run you these days? Probably around $300 per night. And
meals (we’ll assume meals for two, and we have to include drinks and
tip)—breakfast, $30. Lunch, $50, afternoon tea, $40, cocktail hour, $40, dinner
at a nice restaurant, $100. Entertainment—live shows, music, films, dancing,
sports…The sky’s the limit, but let’s say you go to a performance every day,
which is what you’ll do on the ship. Minimum $100 for two seats at a live show.
We’re already up to $680 per day, and that’s without the complimentary butler
you get to have on the cruise. So you can see that a do-it-yourself vay-cay is a
lot more trouble and a lot more expensive than a cruise.
On this cruise, all-inclusive actually means ALL inclusive:
INCLUDED IN THE CRUISE FARE :: Spacious suites with private verandas :: Butler
service in every suite :: Free WiFi throughout the ship :: Personalized service
– nearly one crew member for every guest :: Multiple restaurants, diverse
cuisine, open-seating dining :: Beverages in-suite and throughout the ship,
including champagne, select wines and spirits :: 24-hour dining service ::
Onboard entertainment and enrichment lecturers :: Complimentary transportation
into town in most ports :: Onboard gratuities
Wait. What? “Enrichment Lecturers”??? Readers, meet your Enrichment Lecturers!
Yep, that’s us. Susan and Elizabeth. Plus you can read to your heart’s content
without being interrupted by ringing phones, work emergencies, needy family
members, or whining pets. And on this particular cruise Elizabeth
George and I will hang out with you.
I mean. What’s better than that?
You could pick Jerry’s brain about apparel design.
You could see for yourself that Elizabeth George’s husband looks like Steve McQueen.
All the while visiting San Juan, St. Maarten, St. Barthelmy, St. Kitts, Tortola,
Punta Cana, Grand Turk...With variety, adventure, romance and relaxation all
expertly woven together, coupled with an overnight in fabulous Saint Barts, this
cruise is truly the ultimate getaway.
If you’re a writer, the cost of the cruise is a business deduction because
you’ll be writing, networking with other writers, and doing research for future
If you’re a teacher, bookseller, librarian, editor, or otherwise involved in
publishing, it’s a professional development activity and I bet your CPA would
find some deductions.
If you’re retired, then just come. You earned it.
See you onboard!
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT! Because I love Fresh Fiction and I
really want you to join us, I’m giving a $100 on-board gift certificate to the
first reader to sign up and mention Fresh Fiction! Call 800.828.4813, sign up
and ask them if you’re first!
Using blunt scissors, a Big Chief tablet, a borrowed
stapler and a Number Two pencil, Susan Wiggs self-published
her first novel at the age of eight. Today she is the
acclaimed, bestselling author of many poignant,
unforgettable novels, including Halfway to Heaven
and Passing Through Paradise. Susan lives on an
island in the Pacific Northwest with her husband, Jay, her
daughter, Elizabeth, and an Airedale that hasn't been
groomed since 1994.
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