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Leigh Statham | Top Five Ways to Ruin Your Dress in a Steampunk Novel
March 19, 2015
5. Dance with a smithieKnown for their extremely large muscles and soul piercing eyes, smithies can be
alluring, but also quite hazardous. Especially to the finest cloth from Paris.
Their physique is largely due to all the time they spend working at the forge
over smoldering fires with heavy tools. This also lends a general air of dirt
and grime which can be hard to scrub out. Even when the boy wants to impress
you, and will try his hardest, his hands will most likely still be black from
gear oil and will leave incriminating evidence on your gown. Best to steer clear
altogether.
4. Follow someone into a cellarThere can be many hidden wonders in a cellar. There can also be many creepy
traps. Anyone you don't know very, very well who wants you to follow them into a
cellar probably isn't worried about you ruining your dress. Plus, cobwebs, ew.
Be very cautious.
3. Run away from homeIt's generally best to run away from home in the middle of the night by cover of
dark. This will prevent supervising adults from catching you and grounding you
for all time and eternity or forcing you into a hasty marriage to an undesirable
count. However, to avoid said count, you must also not bring a lamp, as strange
lamps in the wilderness in the middle of the night tend to draw attention to
themselves and give old ladies heart attacks. This will leave you stumbling
around in the dark as your only option. If the way is clear, you will most
likely run for fear of being caught, and you will also, most likely, fall and
ruin your dress. If the way is under cover of bush and tree, you will then most
likely catch your gown on said shrubberies and tear it anyway.
2. Get shot atGuns have a very bad habit of leaving holes in things. Even if the said firearm
does not kill you, but grazes your arm, it will make a nasty hole in your
garment, thus leaving you bleeding and in a bad mood. This could also leave you
with nothing suitable to wear to the next party without a fitting. Quite
inconvenient.
1. 86 the suckerGowns, although elegant and quite flattering to the female figure, can also get
in the way of many necessary opportunities (see above). It is therefore advised
that you wad your gowns up and toss them in the rubbish heap. Dump them. Burn
them. Chuck them in the channel, feed them to the fowl, generally destroy them
in any way that seems fitting to your situation. This will, undoubtedly leave
you with a ruined dress, should you decide you need one after all. But we are
certain after trying a nice pair of aviation trousers, you will never go back to
the frothy, frilly ways of maidenhood again.
GiveawayReaders, would you dare wear a dress in a steampunk novel? Leave a comment below
to be entered to win an ebook copy of THE PERILOUS
JOURNEY OF THE NOT-SO-INNOCUOUS GIRL. Three winners will be chosen;
international entries allowed. About THE PERILOUS JOURNEY OF THE NOT-SO-INNOCUOUS GIRLLady Marguerite lives a life most 17th century French girls can only dream of:
Money, designer dresses, suitors and a secure future. Except, she suspects her
heart may be falling for her best friend Claude, a common smithie in the
family's steam forge. When Claude leaves for New France in search of a better life, Marguerite decides
to follow him and test her suspicions of love. Only the trip proves to be more
harrowing than she anticipated. Love, adventure and restitution await her, if
she can survive the voyage.
About Leigh StathamLeigh Statham was raised
in the wilds of rural Idaho, but found her heart in New York City. She worked as
a waitress, maid, artist, math teacher, nurse, web designer, art director,
thirty-foot inflatable pig and mule wrangler before she settled down in the
semi-quiet role of wife, mother and writer. She resides in North Carolina with
her husband, four children, five chickens and two suspected serial killer cats.
If the air is cool and the sun is just coming up over the horizon, you can find
her running the streets of her small town, plotting her next novel with the sort
of intensity that will one day get her hit by a car. Connect with the Author: Website |Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads
Comments
17 comments posted.
Re: Leigh Statham | Top Five Ways to Ruin Your Dress in a Steampunk Novel
You know, I doubt that I would dare to wear a dress in a
steampunk story. Dresses can encumber and that would not be
wise.
(G. Bisbjerg 1:53pm March 19, 2015)
Haha! My dress would probably get ruined following someone into
the cellar. I'm too curious and believe myself to be sneaky.
(Susan Voss 9:01pm March 19, 2015)
Thank you for allowing me to enter this contest. I do hope
I win so I get a chance to win your book. GOOD LUCK to all
who enter this contest.
(Renae Kelly 9:20pm March 19, 2015)
I'd go with trousers most of the time, but I'd want to have
a dress stashed away for appropriate occasions.
(Janie McGaugh 10:20pm March 19, 2015)
I hate dresses as is, so aviation trousers sound like just the thing for me. Dress me up spiffy in a nice suit for fancy times, and leave the dresses to the wilting lilies who don't go on adventures!
(Rebecca Dee 10:53am March 20, 2015)
I would wear a dress in a steampunk novel, but it would have
to have some fun gadgets. :)
(Rachel Collings 11:26am March 20, 2015)
I like dresses, but never have the opportunity to wear them-
plus the fact that I hate pantyhose.
(Amber Kuehn 2:26pm March 20, 2015)
I think pants would be safer in a novel like this,
(Sue Farrell 4:27pm March 20, 2015)
I am more comfortable in pants and probably would have the
dress tucked away in my luggage that I took on my adventure
for when it comes in handy. Congratulations on your new
book:THE PERILOUS JOURNEY OF THE NOT-SO-INNOCUOUS GIRL. Your
book sounds fantastic and I would love to win and read it
this year. Thank You very much. Cecilia Dunbar Hernandez
CECE
(Cecilia Dunbar Hernandez 6:54pm March 20, 2015)
Nope, I would not wear a dress...lol
(Sabrina(Mippy) Templin 10:07pm March 20, 2015)
I am much more comfortable wearing dresses but it depends
on the occasion. A simple dress for a simple occasion and a
fancy dress for an elegant event. In this case, I'll take
the dare and try wearing a dress in a steampunk novel. :)
(Daiane Chen 9:23am March 21, 2015)
I'd prefer wearing pants. Sounds like a good adventuresome story, and I haven't read any steampunk novels before. Gadgets, dirt, grime, grease, cobwebs on my journey await me!
(Rich Cook 3:45pm March 21, 2015)
Steampunk can be fun- especially seeing how the heroines
manage such adventures with their fancy dresses!
(Debbie Wiley 8:05pm March 21, 2015)
I think a dress would add a challenge so why not??
(Melissa Ogletree 12:34pm March 22, 2015)
As I avoid wearing a dress of any kind if I possibly can then I
doubt I'd be in danger of ruining a dress in a steam punk novel
whatever that may be...if I've read one, I don't know of it.
Sounds like they'd be fun.
(Glenda Hefty 12:49pm March 22, 2015)
No dress for me, too hard to get around in
a dress!
(Ashley Applebee 4:07pm March 22, 2015)
I think it would be fun to wear a dress in a steampunk novel, especially if it had a lot of hidden gadgets.
(Bonnie H 9:47pm March 24, 2015)
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