Chapter One
Scotland, Spring 1475
What was an angel doing standing next to Brother Matthew?
Liam thought as he peered through his lashes at the couple
frowning down at him. And why could he not fully open his
eyes? Then the pain hit and he groaned. Brother Matthew
and the angel bent closer.
"Do ye think he will live?" asked Brother Matthew.
"Aye," replied the angel, "though I suspicion he will
wish he hadnae for a wee while."
Strange that an angel should possess a voice that
made a man think of firelight, bedchambers, soft unclothed
skin, and thick furs, Liam mused. He tried to lift his
hand, but the pain of even the smallest movement proved
too much to bear. He felt as if he had been trampled by a
horse. Mayhap several horses. Very large horses.
"He is a bonnie lad," said the angel as she gently
smoothed one small, soft hand over Liam's forehead.
"How can ye tell that he is bonnie?" He looks as if
someone staked him to the ground and rode over him with a
herd of horses."
Brother Matthew and he had always thought alike in
many ways, Liam recalled. He was one of the few men Liam
had missed after leaving the monastery. He now missed the
touch of the angel's soft hand. For the brief time it had
brushed against he forehead, it had felt as if that light
touch had smoothed away some of his pain.
"Aye, he does that," replied the angel. "And, yet,
one can still see that he is tall, lean, and weel formed."
"Ye, shouldnae be noticing such things!"
"Wheesht, Cousin, I am nay blind,"
"Mayhap, but 'tis still wrong. And, he isnae at his
bestnow, ye ken."
"Och, nay, that is for certain. Howbeit, I am
thinking that is best is verra good, aye? Mayhap as good
as our cousin Payton, do ye think?"
Brother Matthew made a very scornful
noise. "Better. Truth tell, 'tis why I ne'er believed he
would stay with us."
Why should his appearance make someone think him a
bad choice for the religious life? Liam did not think
that was a particularly fair judgment, but could not seem
to give voice to that opinion. Despite the pain he was
in, his thoughts were clear enough. He just seemed unable
to voice them, or make any movement to indicate that he
heard these people discussing him. Even though he could
look at them through his lashes, his eyes were obviously
not opening enough to let them know he was awake.
"Ye dinnae think he had a true calling?" asked the
angel.
"Nay," Brother Matthew replied. "Oh, he liked the
learning weel enough, was verra quick and bright, but we
could only teach him so much here. We are but a small
monastery, nay a rich one, and nay a great teaching
place. I think, too, that he found this place too quiet,
too peaceful. He missed his family. I have met his
kinsmen and I can understand. A large, loud, somewhat,
weel, untamed lot of men they are. The learning offered
eased that restlessness in Liam for a while, but it wasnae
enough in the end. The quiet routine, the sameness of the
days, began to wear upon his spirit, I think."
Liam was a little surprised at how well his old friend
knew and understood him. He had been restless, still was
in many ways. The quiet of the monastery, the rigid
schedule of the monastic life, had begun to press in upon
him and feel more smothering than comforting. He had
missed his family. For a moment he was glad that he
seemed unable to speak for he feared he would be asking
for them now like some forlorn child.
"Tis hard," said the angel. "I am most surprised that
ye settled into the life so verra weel. But ye have a
true, deep calling, dinnae ye?"
"Aye, I do," Brother Matthew replied softly. "I did
e'en as a child. But, ne'er think I dinnae miss all of
ye, Keira. I did and do most painfully at time, but there
is a brotherhood here, a family of sorts. Yet, I will
probably visit again soon. I have begun to spend a great
deal of time wondering how the bairns have brown, if
everyone is still hale and strong, and many another sort
of thing. Letters dinnae tell all."
"Nay, they dinnae." Keira sighed. "I have missed
them all, too, and I have been gone but a six-month."
Keira. Liam repeated the name in his mind. A fine
name. He tried to move his arm despite the pain and felt
a twinge of panic when it would not respond to his
command. When he realized he was bound to his bed, his
unease grew even stronger. Why would they do that to
him? Why did they not wish him to move? Were his
injuries so dire? Was he wrong to think he had been given
aid? Even as those questions spun through his mind, he
fought past his pain enough to tug against his bonds. A
groan escaped him as that pain quickly and fiercely swept
through his body from head to toe. He stilled when a pair
of small, soft hands touched him, one upon his forehead
and one upon his chest.
"I think he begins to wake, Cousin," Keira
said. "Hush, sir. Be at peace."
"Tied." Liam hissed the word out from between tightly
gritted teeth, the pain caused by speaking that one small
word telling him that his face and undoubtedly taken a
severe beating. "Why?"
"To keep ye still, Liam," Brother Matthew
said. "Keira doesnae think anything is broken save for
your right leg, but ye were thrashing about so much it
worried us some."
"Aye," agreed Keira. "Ye were beat near to death,
sir. Tis best if ye remain verra still so as not to add
to your injuries or pain. Are ye in much pain?"
Liam muttered a fierce curse at what he considered a
very stupid question. He heard Brother Matthew gasp in
shock. To his surprise, he heard Keira laugh softly.
"T'was indeed a foolish question," she said, laughter
still tinting her sultry voice. "Ye dinnae seem to have a
spot upon ye that isnae brilliant with bruising. Aye, and
your right leg was broken. Tis a verra clean break and I
have set it. After three days there is still no sign of
poison in the wound or in the blood, so it should heal
verra weel."
"Liam, 'tis Brother Matthew. Keira and I have brought
ye to the wee cottage at the edge of the monastery's
lands. The brothers wouldnae allow he to tend to your
wounds within the monastery, I fear." He sighed. "They
werenae too happy with her presence e'en though she was
weel hidden away in the guest quarters. Brother Paul was
particularly agitated."
"Agitated?" Keira muttered. "Cousin Elspeth would
say he--"
"Aye," Brother Matthew hastily interrupted, "I ken
what our cousin Elspeth would say. I think she has lived
too long amoungst those unruly Armstrongs. She has
gained far too free a tongue for a proper lady."
Keira mad a rude noise. "My, but ye have become verra
pious, Cousin."
"Of course I have. I am a monk. We are trained to be
pious. Now, I can help ye give Liam some potion or change
his bandages, if ye wish, but then I must return to the
monastery."
"Ah, weel then, best see if he needs to relieve
himself," Keira said. "I will just step outside so that
ye can see to that. Now that his is waking, 'tis best, I
think. I shall just run up to the monastery's garden and
collect a few herbs. I shall be but a moment."
"What do ye mean now that he is waking?" demanded Brother
Matthew, but then he grunted with irritation when the only
reply he got was the door closing behind Keira as she
hurried away. "Wretched wee lass."
"Cousin ?" Liam asked, realizing that not only was his
throat injured, but his jaw and his mouth as well.
"Cousin? Oh, aye, the lass is my cousin. One of a
vast horde of cousins, if truth be told. A Murray, ye
ken?"
"Kirkcaldy?"
"Tis what I am, aye. Her grandmother was one, too.
Now, I do fear that nay matter how gently I am, this is
going to hurt."
It did. Liam was sure he screamed at one point and
that only increased his pain. He welcomed the blackness
when it swept over him, as he suspected the continuously
apologizing Brother Matthew did.
"Oh, dear, he looks a wee bit paler," Keira said as
she set the herbs she had collected down on a table and
moved to stand beside the small bed Liam was tied to.
"He still suffers a great deal of pain, and I fear I
added to it," said Brother Matthew.
"Ye couldnae help it, Cousin. He is better, nay doubt
about it, but such injuries will be slow to heal. There
truly isnae a part of this mon that isnae hurt.
Tis a true miracle that only his leg was broken."
"Are ye certain that he was only beaten? Or that he
was e'en beaten at all?"
"Aye, Cousin, he was beaten. I have nay doubt about
that, but he could have been tossed off that hill, too.
Some of these injuries could be from the rocky slope his
body would have fallen down and the equally rocky ground
he landed on. I dinnae suppose he was able to tell ye
what happened to him, was he?"
"Och, nay. Nay. He spoke but a word or two, then
made a painful cry, and has been like this e'er since."
Brother Matthew shook his head. I wish I could understand
this. Who would do such a terrible thing to the mon? I
ken I havenae seen that much of the mon o'er the years
since he left here, but he really wasnae the sort of mon
to make enemies. Certainly nay such vicious ones."
Keira idly tested the strength of the bonds that held
Liam still upon the bed and carefully studied the man. "I
suspect jealousy is a problem he must often deal with."
Brother Matthew frowned at his cousin. She seemed far
too interested in Liam Cameron, revealing more than just a
healer's interest in a patient. A healer surely did not
need to touch her patient's hair as often as Keira did
Liam's thick dark, copper hair. Liam was not looking his
best, might well have lost a little of his beauty due to
this vicious beating, but there was clearly enough allure
left in his battered body and face to draw Keira's
interest.
He tried to see Keira as a woman grown, not simply as
the cousin he had played with as a child. His eyes
widened slightly as he began to see that his cousin was no
teasing child now, but a very attractive woman. She was
small and slight, yet womanly, for her breasts were well
shaped and full and her hips were pleasingly curved. Her
hair was a rich, shining black, and hung in a thick braid
to well past her tiny waist. That hair made her fair skin
look even purer, a soft milk whit with the blush of good
health. Keira's oval face held a delicate beauty, her
nose being small and straight, a hint of strength revealed
in her small chin, and her cheekbones being high and
finely shaped. What caught everyone's interest was her
eyes. Set beneath gently arced dark brows and trimmed
with thick, long lashes, were a pair of deep green eyes.
Those wide eyes bespoke innocence, but their depths held
all the womanly mystery that could so intrigue a man. He
was a little startled to realize that her mouth, slightly
wide and full of lip, held the same contradictions. Her
smile could be the epitome of sweet innocence, but Brother
Matthew suddenly knew men of the world would quickly see
the sensuality there as well. He suddenly feared it had
been a serious error in judgment on his part to allow her
to tend to a man like Liam Cameron.
"Ye have a rather fierce look upon your face, Cousin,"
Keira said as she moved to begin preparing more salve for
Liam's injuries. "He willnae die, I promise ye. He will
just be a verra long time in healing."
"I believe ye. Tis just that, weel, one thing Liam
did find hard to abide about the monastic life was, weel,
was--"
"No lasses to smile at." She grinned at the severe
frown he gave her for it sat so ill upon his boyishly
handsome face. "I think, just as with our cousin Payton,
this mon has a way with the lasses. Aye, and he need do
nay more than smile at them."
"I dinnae think he e'en has to smile," grumbled
Brother Matthew.
"Nay, probably not. Come, Cousin, dinnae look so
troubled. He is no danger to me now, is he? Aye, and
e'en when he is healed enough to smile again, he can only
be a danger to me if I wish him to be. Ye cannae think
that, with the kinsmen I have, I havenae been verra weel
taught in the ways of men." She glanced toward Liam. "Is
he a bad mon, then? A vile, heartless seducer of
innocents?"
Brother Matthew sighed. "Nay, I would ne'er believe
such a thing of him."
"Then there is naught to fret o'er, is there. Tis
best if we worry o'er our many other troubles. They are
of more importance than whether or nay I cam resist the
sweet smiles of a bonnie lad. I have been here nigh on
two months now, Cousin. There has been nary a sign of my
enemy so I think, soon, I must try to get home to
Donncoill."
"I ken it. I am fair surprised none of your kinsmen
have come round. Tis odd that they wouldnae start to
wonder on how long ye have stayed at a monastery, or e'en
why the monks would allow it."
Keira pushed aside the pinch of guilt she felt for
allowing him to continue to believe she had contracted her
family when she had not. "Tisnae so verra unusual for
guests, male or female, to linger in the guest quarters,
and I paid weel for the privilege."
She smiled and patted his arm when he flushed with
embarrassment over that hard truth. "It has been worth
it. I needed to hide and mend my wounds, needed to
o'ercome my grief and fear, and needed to be certain that,
when I did go home, I wasnae leading that murderous
bastard Rauf right to the gates of Donncoill."
Your family would protect ye, Keira. They would feel it
their duty, their right, and willnae be pleased that ye
have denied them."
Keira winced. "I ken it, but I will deal with it. I
also had to decide what to do. Duncan pulled a vow from
me and I had to think hard on how to fulfill it, and how
much it might cost me to do so."
"I ken that willnae be easy. Rauf is cunning and
vicious. Yet, ye swore to your husgand ye would see to it
that his people didnae suffer under Rauf's rule if he
failed to win the battle that night. He failed. He died
that night, Keira, so your vow to him is much akin to one
made at a mon's deathbed. Ye have to do all ye can to
fulfill it." He kissed her cheek and started for the
door. "I will see ye in the morning. Sleep weel."
"Ye, too, Cousin."
The moment he was gone, Keira sighed and sat down in
the little chair next to Liam Cameron's bed. Her cousin
made it all sound so simple. She dearly wished it were.
The vow she had made to her poor, ill-fated husband
weighed heavily on her mind and heart. So did the fates
of the people of Ardgleann. Duncan had cared deeply for
his people, a mixed lot of gentle and somewhat odd souls.
It distressed her to think of how they must be suffering
under Rauf's rule. She prayed for them every night, but
she could not fully dispel the guilt she felt over running
away. Although some of what Duncan had asked of her did
not seem right, the people of Ardgleann could no longer
wait for her to debate the moral complexities of it all.
It was time, far past time, to do something.
She idly bathed LIam with a soft cloth and cool
water. He did not really have a fever, but it seemed to
make him rest more quietly. He was a strong man and she
felt certain he would continue to recover. When he would
be able to tend to hiself, she had better have decided
what to do about Ardgleann and Rauf. Once she knew why
Liam had been hurt and was certain that no enemy hunted hi
still, she would leave him in the care of the monks and
face her own destiny.
Keira felt an immediate pang at the thought of leaving
the man and almost laughed at the absurdity of it. He was
a mass of bruises and had hardly said three words in as
many days. She supposed that she felt some odd bond with
him because she had been the one to find him. I truth,
she had been drawn to him by an odd blend of dreams and
compulsion. It had been a little frightening for,
although similar experiences had occurred in the past, she
had never seen things so clearly or felt so strongly.
Even now she could not shake the feeling that there was
more to it all than helping him recover from his injuries.
"Foolishness," she muttered and shook her head as she
patted him dry with a soft rag.
Perhaps she should send word to his people, she
thought as she began to make a hearty broth to feed hi
when he woke again. From what her cousin had told her, Sir
Liam's kinsmen were more than capable of protecting him.
Keira quickly discarded the idea for the same reason she
gave her cousin when he had suggested sending for the
Camerons. Sir Liam might not want that, might be
reluctant to pull his family into whatever trouble he had
gotten himnself into. She could sympathize for, she, too,
hesitated to involve her family in her own troubles.
That , too, was foolish, she suspected. She had done
nothing wrong, had not caused the trouble or invited the
danger. If one of her family were in such trouble, she
would be ready to ride to his side. Which is why he or
she would hesitate to tell her about it, she suddenly
thought and briefly grinned. It was instinctive to try to
keep a loved one safe. When her family found out the
truth, they would be angry, perhaps even a little offended
or hurt, but they would understand for they would know in
their hearts that they would have done the same thing.
And, she told herself as she sat down at the small
table near the fire, if this man were as close to his
family as her cousin implied, he would do the same. The
last time she had seen her cousin Gillyanne, she had heard
a few tales about the Camerons. Even though the tales had
been told to amuse everyone, they had revealed that the
Camerons were probably as close a family as her own.
There was also Sir Liam's manly pride to consider. It
would undoubtedly bristle at the implication that he could
not take care of himself. No, Keira decided, it was not a
good idea to send for his people without his permission.
After a meal of bread, cheese and cold venison, Keira
took a hasty bath. She then settled herself upon a pallet
near the fire. Keira stared into the flames and waited
for sleep to come. She hated this time of the night,
hated the silence, and hated the fact that sleep was so
slow to come, leaving her alone in the silence with her
memories. Try as she might, she could not shake free of
the grip of those dark memories. She could only suppress
them for a while.
Duncan had been a good man, passingly handsome and
gentle. She had not loved him and she still felt guilty
about that, even though it was hardly her fault. At
nearly two-and-twenty, however, she had decided she could
wait no longer for some great, passionate love to stroll
her way. She had wanted children and a home of her own.
Although she loved her family deeply, she had felt an
increasing need to spread her winds, to walk her own
path. Marriage did not usually free a woman, but all her
instincts had told her that Duncan would never try to
master her. He had wanted a true partner and, knowing how
rare that was, she had accepted him when he had asked her
to be his bride.
She could still recall the doubts of her family,
especially those of her grandmother Lady Maldie and her
cousin Gillyanne. Their special gifts had told them that
she did not love the man she was about to marry. They had
sensed her unease, one she could not explain even to
herself. Keira was not sure it was good thing that they
had not pressed her on that, and then roundly scolded
herself. They had respected her choice, and it had been
her choice.
Why she had felt uneasy fro the moment she had
accepted Duncan's proposal of marriage was still a puzzle
to her. Keira had smothered that unease and married him.
Within hours of marrying him, the first hint of trouble
between then had begun and within days of reaching
Ardgleann the trouble with Rauf had begun. She had
thought that explained all those odd feelings she had
suffered, but now she was not so sure. Every instinct she
had told her that the puzzle was not yet solved.
Just as she began to relax, welcoming the comfort of
sleep. A harsh cry from Sir Liam startled her. Keira
tugged on her gown and hurried to his side to find him
straining against his bonds, muttering furious curses at
enemies only he could see. She stroked his forehead and
spoke softly to him, telling him over and over where he
was, who cared for him now, and that he was safe. It
surprised her a little when he quickly grew calm again.
"Jolene?" he whispered.
Keira wondered why hearing him speak another woman's
name should irritate her as much as it did. "Nay, Keira,"
she said as she policed her hand over his to try to stop
him from tugging at his bonds.
"Keira," he repeated and grasped her hand in
his. "Aye. Keira. Black hair. Confused me. Thought I
was home. At Dubheidland."
"Ah. She is your healer?" Keira tried to wriggle her
hand free of his grasp, but he would not release her, so
she sat down in the chair at his bedside.
"Sigimor's wife. Lady of Dubheidland. Thought I was
home."
"So ye said. I can give ye something to ease the
pain, if ye wish it."
"Nay. Thought I was caught again."
"She could see that it pained him to speak, but could
not resist asking, "Do ye remember what happened to you?"
"Caught. Beaten. Thrown away. You found me?"
"Aye, me and my cousin Brother Matthew>"
"Good. Safe here."
"Aye, ye will be." She tried again to wriggle her
hand free of his, but failed.
"Stay." He heaved a sigh. "Please. Stay."
Keira inwardly cursed the weakness that caused her to
heed that plea. She carefully shifted her seat closer to
the bed so that she could sit more comfortably as sh3e
waited for him to release her hand. After a few moments
of silence, she wondered if he had gone back to sleep, but
his grip upon her hand remained firm. To her surprise, he
began to stroke the back of her hand with his thumb. The
warmth that gesture stirred within was a little alarming,
but she could not bring herself to stop him.
This was not good, Keira thought. The light brush of
a man's thumb over her hand should not make her feel
warm. True, it was a very nice hand, the fingers long and
elegant, but it was too benign a caress to stir any
interest. Or, it should be. She looked at his battered
face and sighed. To all the troubles she already had, she
realized she now had to add one more. A man she did not
know, a man whose face was so bruised and swollen it would
probably give a child the night terror, could stir her
blood with the simple stroke of his thumb.