[Jade Rousseau, the heroine,
needs a fake fiancΓ© to impress her family values employer,
and
thereβs nary a guy in her life right now. Her girlfriends
Kimberly
and Amarjeet persuade her to go to
the Raining Men bachelor auction, for charity. All the men
come out
on stage and Jade makes a list of her four top picks, all
nice conservative,
white-collar guys. Even though the one man who really turns
her on is
firefighter Quinn OβMalley. After all the men have taken
their turn,
itβs time to start the bidding. Sheβs enlisted her
girlfriends to
bid for her, because her bossβs wife is at the auction and
Jade canβt
let her see her βbuyingβ a man sheβs soon going to
introduce as
her fiancΓ©.]
Cara, the red-dressed emcee,
took the stage. βThanks again to all these wonderful,
handsome, amazing
bachelors who have participated in the auction. Itβs easy
to give
a little money to charity, but these men have gone above
and beyond.
Theyβre giving their time β their brains and muscles and
charm β
for tonightβs valuable cause. And they donβt even get a tax
receipt!
So letβs show them all how much we appreciate it.β
The room exploded with cheers
and applause. βIβm so nervous,β I murmured to Amarjeet.
βHave faith. If itβs meant
to be, then it will happen.β Her pronouncement was
punctuated by a
hiccup.
Cara reintroduced Justin, my
first choice, and called for bids. The lights stayed on so
everyone
could see who was bidding. As the bids rose, I leaned past
Amarjeet
to whisper to Kimberly, βShouldnβt you bid?β
βI think we should pass on
Justin and figure out how things work.β
It wasnβt like her to be
cautious. Had Amarjeet been talking strategy to her?
The bidding for Justin heated
up, rising to over five hundred dollars, then stopped with
a flashy
redhead. And then it was the next bachelorβs turn. We
watched until
the high school teacher, my next choice, came on stage.
After a couple
bids, I hissed at Kimberly, βCome on!β
βRight.β She placed a bid
and someone topped it. When I hissed again, she placed
another, of four
hundred dollars. A young brunette topped it, another bid
came in, then
the brunette topped that one. Amarjeet said, βKimberly,
donβt bid
again. That womanβs determined. Itβs not worth going high
enough
to win.β
βYouβre right. Sorry, Jade,
this isnβt your guy.β Her giggle told me she, too, was
tipsy.
After another few bachelors,
it was the doctor. βBid on this one,β I reminded Kimberly.
βHave you thought seriously
about his job?β
βHeβs a family practitioner.
Whatβs not to like?β
βHe spends a lot of time
peering up womenβs vaginas,β Kimberly said, loudly enough
that we
both hushed her.
βItβs his job,β I said.
βBut isnβt it kind of creepy?β
She gave an exaggerated grimace. βWouldnβt you feel weird,
going
to bed with him after heβd spent his day doing that?β
Surely doctors viewed the female
bodies they saw at work in an objective, professional way.
And the female
body in their personal life in a completely different
manner. Didnβt
they?
βI heard a talk show the
other day,β Kimberly said, βwhere some doctors said they
couldnβt
do gynecology or general practice because the vagina thing
made them
uncomfortable.β
βWell, heβs obviously not
one of them.β
βNo, but ββ
βMoot point,β Amarjeet
said, sounding almost smug. βWhile you two were arguing,
someone else
bought him.β
βDamn.β I shifted anxiously
as the winner claimed a hug from the doctor. How could I
have lost out
on three men? βIβm down to just the civil rights lawyer.
Kimberley,
you have to win him.β He was an excellent candidate. Sure,
I hadnβt
felt enthusiastic when Iβd seen him on stage, but that was
only because
the firefighter had me so fired up. Speaking of whom, heβd
been up
after the doctor . . .
And there was Quinn OβMalley,
strolling across the stage with his distinctive brand of
male confidence
and grace.
βI wonder what the woman
who wins him will make him do?β Amarjeet asked with a
wicked, slightly
drunken grin.
βPut out her fire?β Kimberly
joked, her voice too loud again. Three drinks were
obviously too much
for us when all weβd eaten were a few tiny appies.
The firefighter had left his
axe behind and stood easily, legs slightly apart, hands
clasped behind
his back. The posture emphasized his muscular chest and
shoulders. Easy
to imagine him hefting a woman in his arms, toting her out
of a burning
building and down one of those long, swaying ladders.
Placing her on
the ground, breathing air into her parched lungs as his
sexy lips caressed
hers. As, under his deft touch, her body came to life. To
aroused, passionate
life.
He glanced around the audience,
a half-smile on his lips, seeming unworried about who would
win him
and what sheβd ask him to do. Vaguely I was aware of women
bidding,
of Amarjeet whispering to Kimberly, but the man on stage
was so fantasy-worthy
that I barely noticed until a new voice joined the bidding.
A voice
I recognized.
I dragged my eyes off Quinn
OβMalley to glare at Kimberly. βWhat are you doing?β
Amarjeet said, βYou only
had one man left on your list, and heβs near the end. Women
will be
getting desperate, bids will be higher. You might not get
that lawyer.β
βBut I donβt want this
guy.β I stared back at the stage. Quinn OβMalley was
watching us.
Our gazes connected and I felt a zap of energy. Sexual
energy.
Kimberly giggled. βThatβs
not what your body language says. Youβre leaning forward
like you
want to leap out of your seat and jump him.β
Quickly I sat back, breaking
that compelling eye connection, and tried to regain my
sanity. βMy
body language is irrelevant.β
βHeβs a hero. And heβs
hot,β Amarjeet said as Kimberly placed another bid.
βFor sure! But I want someone
more conventional. White collar job, good looking but not
so ββ
βFreaking gorgeous?β Kimberly
put in.
βExactly.β
βWell, thatβs too bad.β
She waved her hand in the air.
A moment later the emceeβs
gavel fell and Kimberly said triumphantly, βBecause this is
the guy
youβre getting.β