Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee
On Sale: April 20, 2010
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Non-Fiction Memoir | Humor
Warning from publisher to reader:
HarperCollins, we are committed to customer satisfaction.
Before proceeding with your purchase, please take the
following questionnaire to determine your likelihood of
enjoying this book:
1. Which of the following do
(a) Women with somewhat
horse-ish facial features.
(b) Women who, while not
super Jew-y, are more identifiably Jewish than, say, Natalie
(c) Frequent discussion of unwanted body hair.
2. Are you offended by the following
(a) Instructing one's
grandmother to place baked goods in her rectal cavity.
(b) Stripping naked in public—eleven times in a row.
Stabbing one's boss in the head with a writing implement.
3. The best way to treat an emotionally
fragile young girl is:
(a) Murder the main
course of her Thanksgiving dinner before her very eyes.
(b) Tell her that her older sister is prettier than she, and
then immediately die.
(c) Prevent her suicide by
recommending she stay away from open windows.
If you read the above questions without getting nauseous
or forming a hate Web site, you are ready to buy this book!
Please proceed to the cashier.
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